Twisted Flicks

A quirky miasma of art and cheap thrills ...

2012-01-12T12:45:00.000+13:00

Movie reviews and images from the seedy underbelly of world cinema. ~~May~~ Definitely does contain offensive language, sex scenes, graphic violence, drug use, horror, gratuitous nudity, and/or traces of nuts.

The Sorcerer and the White Snake. China/HK, 2011

I guess The Sorcerer and the White Snake is the Chinese equivalent of a blockbuster. Big name stars, melodramatic romance, talking animals. Usually not my bag at all. But this is one amazing-looking spectacle and as far as blockbuster entertainment goes you could do a lot worse ... Read more

Helldriver. Japan, 2011

Zombie-dispensing mayhem with the usual top notch splatter effects mixed with equally amateurish ones. There are moments of visual brilliance, some great set pieces, and enough blood and severed body parts to fill 382 Olympic-sized swimming pools. It's extremely over-the-top, contrived to shock, and very, very silly ... Read more

The Evil Dead. USA, 1981

Unfairly referred to on release as a 'video nasty', it's far better than that description might suggest, and is a highly accomplished genre film that pushed the creative envelope in many directions, despite its low-budget origins ... Read more

Cold Fish. Japan, 2011

It was with much anticipation that I caught Sion Sono's latest flick at a Film Festival this weekend. I was expecting something surreal and gory, and I knew it was based on a real-life serial killer. But what I didn't expect was the funniest movie I've seen this year... Read more

The Raquel Welch Project. One Million Years B.C, 1966

While the search for a good Raquel Welch movie continues, I had a pretty good idea this was not likely to be one of them. Nevertheless, this is the movie that launched her as an international sex symbol, and the source of the infamous loinskin bikini ... Read more

Nicole Kidman to star in Park Chan-wook's next

Korean director Park Chan-wook is slated to helm his first Western movie, Stoker, which is now in pre-production. And Nicole Kidman has been cast in the lead. A strange casting choice I thought, so out of interest I canvassed readers for their opinion on the actress. Results inside

The Hokusai Manga aka Edo Porn. Japan, 1981

An Academy Award-winning film that features Tentacle Porn? Not likely right? Well, it is when its the Japanese Academy Awards! This historical drama about famed artist Katsushika Hokusai is a quality historical drama with its fair share of titillation ... Read more

Braindead aka Dead-Alive. New Zealand, 1992

Before Peter Jackson won Oscar glory with Lord of the Rings, he was the Splatter King of B-Movies. This balls-out orgy of zombie mayhem may well be the single greatest achievement in B-grade zombie cinema, and incredibly funny for those with a twisted sense of humor ... Read more

Zebraman 2: Attack on Zebra City. Japan, 2010

Takashi Miike, Sho Aikawa, Miniskirt police and a godzilla-sized green alien with a deadly fart ray. What more do you need to know? ... Read more

Enter the Void. France, 2009

A twisted, visceral, mind-blowing experience with huge ambitions that no doubt will prove far too edgy for the Oscars, even though its now firmly in front-running for my movie of the year. Hallucinogenic, sexy, transcendent, experimental, in-your-face, and brutal by turns - its not for everyone ... Read more

Angst. Austria, 1983

For fans of true crime, and anyone seeking a more authentic psycho killer experience this surely rates as one of the most successful of its type. It's nasty, it's seedy, it's disturbing - just like the crime itself. What was the film's biggest downfall is also its greatest asset - it's honesty ... Read more

XX: Beautiful Hunter. Japan, 1994

From famed Japanese Pinku director Masaru Konuma comes this mid-90's Girls with Guns genre piece, fully stocked with guns, sex, blood and a touch of S&M-themed torture thrown in for good measure ... Read more

Vanilla Sky. USA, 2001

The film that Vanilla Sky is based on, Alejandro Amenabar's Abre los Ojos (Open Your Eyes) is one of my all-time favourite films. And amazingly enough, so is this. Cameron Crowe took the opportunity to not only remake the movie, but to try and improve upon it as well. I still can't decide which of the two films I like better. Read more

School of the Holy Beast. Japan, 1974

Nunsploitation. What the fuck, right? It makes me laugh just to say it! But if you're looking for the Rolls-Royce of exploitation films, then this surely must be it. Despite the gorgeous visuals, the story doesn't shirk the exploitation factor, and has all the gratuitous and lurid content you could hope for. Read more

Angel Heart. USA, 1987

To take a break from the usual cult trash, obscure oddities and hyper-crazy foreign flicks, this week we revisit a true classic - one of my all time favourite films, Alan Parker's voodoo-infused neo-noir horror, Angel Heart. A unique and fascinating film, enhanced considerably by a top notch cast and incredible production values Read more

Candy, USA 1968

As a naive and trusting coed with a heart of gold, Candy is unaware of the effect she has on men, and seems like a bewildered Alice, in a Wonderland populated with sleazy, horny men. Light-hearted bawdy fun, and a worthwhile cinematic trip back to the 60's.
Read on

Boxer's Omen, Hong Kong 1983

I've seen more than my share of utterly bat-shit movies in my time, but this may be one of THE most twisted movies I've ever seen. Starting out as a martial arts movie, it segues into a triad theme, introduces a supernatural ghost-monk, and cuts to a gratuitous sex scene ... all within the first 15 minutes!
Read on

Black Dynamite, USA 2009

A hilariously cheesy throwback to the golden era of 70s blaxploitation - complete with the requisite sexism, racism, macho posturing and kung fu! Some jive turkey has killed his brother and its up to Black Dynamite to find out who is responsible!
Read on

Thirst, Korea 2009

What can one of the most exciting directors in Asia bring to the well-established, and frequently all too predictable, vampire genre? Well rest assured there's loads of sex and blood, and the odd bit of ultra-violence thrown in for good measure ...
Read on

Angel-A, France 2005

The stunning cinematography around picturesque Paris, combined with the decision to film in black and white lends the film an artistic and classy aesthetic, however the delivery is anything but pretentious. Instead director Luc Besson has delivered a mature and sexy comedy/fantasy that is enjoyable from start to finish ...
Read on

The Sorcerer and the White Snake

2012-01-12T12:44:00.000+13:00

China / Hong Kong, 2011
Director: Siu-Tung Ching
Stars: Jet Li, Eva Huang, Charlene Choi, Raymond Lam, Vivian Hsu
IMDB: 5.8

I guess The Sorcerer and the White Snake is the Chinese equivalent of a blockbuster. Big name stars, melodramatic romance, talking animals. Usually not my bag at all. Except I do enjoy interpretations of female snake demons that crop up in Chinese movies, and especially the sheer spectacle that Chinese cinema can produce these days.

Recent high-budget movies coming from this region have been technically and artistically astonishing - especially when combined with the rich cultural history they draw from. Director Siu-Tung Ching has seemingly marshalled a formidable army of CGI artists and set designers to realise a supernatural romantic blockbuster of epic proportions.

Obviously developed with mass-appeal in mind, there's something here for everyone, and should be enjoyable by anyone in the mood for a good popcorn flick.Jet Li plays a demon-hunting, kung-fu-fighting, flying sorcerer monk exhibiting god-like supernatural powers along with buddhist traits of patience, virtue and wisdom. Basically he's the man - as you'd expect in a Jet Li movie. He's so righteous he resists a harem of (bamboo) pole-dancing sirens as they lasciviously tempt him in one of the films saucier moments.

Meanwhile, two snake-demon sisters, known as the White Snake (Eva Huang, wow) and Green Snake (Charlene Choi) are frolicking about in the forest. White Snake spies a mortal that she fancies and soon enough a forbidden love develops between them.Misty-eyed yearning and professions of undying love ensue, accompanied by obligatory sweeping-epic mood music that signals melodramatic tension through frequencies designed to penetrate the subconscious emotion centers of your neo-cortex directly.

Thankfully melodrama is not the only aspect of this multi-faceted film. Fight sequences including aerial kung-fu, power-blasts and general mass destruction somewhat reminiscent of a playstation button masher occur regularly to break up the schmaltz. Demons take the shape of humans or animals, there's an army of mice, a talking tortoise, vampiric bat-demons and more. While obviously operating within a fantasy reality, nevertheless the supernatural back-story with ingrained buddhist philosophy seems self-consistent and was well thought through. At least to a gweilo like myself who is prepared to swallow any amount of eastern hokum pokum at face value.

The most impressive part of the movie for me was the visuals though. Although the CGI was over-used, and not always convincing, the many moments of sublimity redeem it. This is a spectacular looking film.

White Snake Eva Huang detracts from these visual aesthetics not a jot. Her starring role means she gets plenty of screentime and looks fabulously Revlon-esque throughout. Although several shots resemble high-gloss shampoo commercials, she and Charlene Choi fill the seductive snake duo roles with beauty and charm.

While the score is melodramatic at times, it has its moments of inspiration. Fight scenes are accompanied with room-shaking bass, and the sections of east/west fusion featuring operatic singing were effective and unique.

I imagine this would be a great movie to catch on the big screen, especially with a date or with family. Arthouse aficianados and fans of genre cinema should go in with expectations suitably adjusted. It is what it is - a popcorn blockbuster family entertainment. But as far as spectacle goes, you could do a whole lot worse.

Helldriver

2011-11-23T07:40:00.000+13:00

Japan, 2010
Original title: Nihon bundan: Heru doraibâ
Director: Yoshihiro Nishimura
Starring: Yumiko Hara, Eihi Shiina, Kazuki Namioka

When I first saw Yoshihiro Nishimura's breakout film Tokyo Gore Police, I was excited. I thought here's a director with some GREAT ideas, an eye for constructing jaw-dropping set pieces, and an anarchistic approach to film-making that totally suited my twisted sensibilities. What could this guy do with more budget, more experience, and a better script? I couldn't wait.

That was 2008. Since then he's helmed 3 more movies. The first was 2009's Vampire Girl vs Frankenstein Girl, and even then I lamented that it was just more of the same. But it was an ok flick, and I still held hope that his masterpiece might be just around the corner. His next was titled 'Mutant Girls Squad', which admittedly doesn't sound like a masterpiece, and wasn't.

And now we have his latest film, Helldriver. If you've seen any of the previous three, the verdict is once again - more of the same. Except now the novelty has worn off and is starting to resemble a rut.

This time around, the Northern part of Japan has been hit with a zombie infection by way of alien invasion, and has been walled off to protect the rest of the country. In a sly jab at political correctness and slimeball politicians, it's not long before there are calls to protect the 'human rights' of the zombies. It's a clever touch, but about as deep as the social commentary gets.

What follows is balls-out zombie-dispensing mayhem with the usual top notch splatter effects mixed with equally amateurish ones. There are moments of visual brilliance, some great set pieces, and enough blood and severed body parts to fill 382 Olympic-sized swimming pools. It's all extremely over-the-top, contrived to shock, and very, very silly.

Which can be fun! But the problem here is that the script mines a well-worn zombie scenario, while bringing little new to the table beyond the shock and gore that Nishimura (a special effects guy by trade) is so well known for. There's smatterings of humour throughout, and even a little 'ero' to go with the 'guro' (which I think is a first for Nishimura, and welcomed). But nowhere near enough for a 2hr long movie with a plot that could be written on a paper napkin.

For this viewer at least, two hours of inventive splatter is just not enough to retain my interest. There needs to also be a good story, or great acting, or lots of humour ... hell, an oversupply of nudity wouldn't hurt the cause either. And if all of the above were to be thrown in at once, THEN we'd be talking about a pony with more than one trick!

The other problem is that the film feels like a 45 minute movie, with bits tacked on at front and back to flesh out the runtime. This isn't helped by the decision to run the title sequence a full 45 minutes into the movie! I don't know if this was an intentional quirk playfully thrown in by Nishimura to break convention, or whether he is in fact implying that he had nothing to do with the first 45, and that this is where 'his' movie really starts. Because basically the first 45 minutes are crap. I recommend skipping them entirely.

And then half an hour from the end, the movie grinds to a natural conclusion, only to kick-start itself back into action for a redundant further half hour. I would not be at all surprised to learn that Nishimura only worked on the middle 45 mins, with the remainder being jobbed out to a junior director. Especially as IMDB has Nishimura listed as 'special effects supervisor' on no less than 33 films in the last three years - no doubt his time is limited!

And so was the budget it seems. Many scenes come across as unfinished and/or rushed, there are some awful visual effects, and what seem like glaring continuity problems. Even within the context of b-grade J-splatter, the limited budget is more visible than you'd expect.

On the plus side, Eihi Shiina (Audition, Tokyo Gore Police) has a major role here, and that's always good in my book - even if she spends a majority of the movie buried beneath less-than-flattering zombie makeup and/or blood. B-grade go-to girl Asami makes an appearance, as does Yukihide Benny. I don't know too much about lead actress Yumiko Hara, except to note that she has a fascinatingly large mouth! She has the physicality to pull off this kind of role, but not the presence that an actress of Eihi Shiina's calibre brings.

First-timers to the hyper-twisted world of Yoshihiro Nishimura may still have a blast with this, especially after a case of beer and with suitably low expectations! The middle 45 minutes are classic Nishimura - and there's a lot to love buried within its two-hour runtime. But I'm still waiting for that masterpiece that proves he's more than a special-effects wizard - ready and able to take up the mantle of driving a new wave of Japanese extreme cinema.

Rating: 5/10

The Evil Dead

2011-10-20T01:54:00.000+13:00

USA, 1981
Director: Sam Raimi
Starring: Bruce Campbell, Ellen Sandweiss, Richard DeManincor

The release of The Evil Dead on Blu-ray seems like a good excuse to revisit this iconic horror film. Ordinarily I'd hesitate to review such a well-known movie - for the simple reason that most horror fans will have already seen it.

But the film is now 30 years old, and I'm sure there's a whole new generation of horror fans yet to discover it, and others who may be wondering how the bluray holds up. If either of these sounds like you, read on ... for there's no doubt that it belongs on this site. There's also a remake in the works ... so if you haven't seen the original yet, do yourself a favor and watch it now before the experience is forever sullied by a lame Hollywood retread.

When the film was made, it was highly controversial - either being banned or given an X certificate in many countries. Unfairly referred to as a 'video nasty', it's far better than that description might suggest, and deserves a more educated assessment. This is a highly accomplished genre film that pushed the creative envelope in many directions, despite its low-budget origins.

The story has a ring of familiarity that horror fans will instantly recognise - a bunch of friends head to a secluded cabin in the woods for a weekend getaway, and thereafter die gruesome deaths one by one. I'm not giving anything away by saying this ... from the first few minutes there's no doubting what territory you're in. But don't let this synopsis put you off, because this is no Hollywood-sanitized, by-the-numbers horror film. For one it is genuinely scary, secondly it has a sly humour about it, and thirdly there is no pandering to conservative ideals of good taste. All of which sets it apart from the vast majority of U.S. horror films made in the 30 years since.

On arriving at the cabin, an old book is discovered along with a tape recording made by the previous occupants. The book is none other than The Book of the Dead, containing the necessary incantations to bring demonic entities back from the underworld. Unfortunately for the group, this is exactly what happens and mayhem ensues. And when I say mayhem, I mean utter ... fucking ... pandemonium. It's gory, twisted and taken to the extreme. Which is my way of saying its an incredibly good time.

Where the film saved on budget was obviously with the cast, who were all unknowns at the time, and for the most-part still are. The obvious exception is chisel-jawed Bruce Campbell who went on to carve himself into cult history with this role and the subsequent sequels.

Technically, the film's accomplishments are astonishing given that it was independently produced on a very limited budget. The camera-work is inventive (especially love the POV shots), and the effects are varied and effective. But what really stands out for me is the sound design - this is a movie that aurally envelopes you in the experience, the sounds being at least as disturbing as the visuals and ensuring that psychological tension is applied and maintained at all the right times. This is where the bluray really shines - I doubt the original mono sound mix could ever have sounded as good as this new DTS HD Master Audio surround-sound presentation. Play it loud!

As for the bluray transfer - I wasn't holding my hopes too high, given that the film was only shot on 16mm to begin with. And while the picture quality can't compete with new release studio films, it was still better than expected. The picture is clean and probably the best it could be ... and besides, the grainy low-budget look to the film adds an extra level of creepiness that suits the film.

For any horror fan this is a must-watch. It has an over-the-top level of creative gore, and is a genuine horror experience. Much more horror than comedy, it straddles the divide between traditional horror and the horror-comedy of its sequel, The Evil Dead II.The Blu-ray has many extra features and is worth picking up for the awesome sound quality alone.

Rating: 8.5/10. Highly recommended.

One Million Years B.C.

2011-08-22T02:35:00.004+12:00

UK, 1966
Director: Don Chaffey
Starring: Raquel Welch, John Richardson, Martine Beswick, Percy Herbert

While the search for a good Raquel Welch movie continues, I had a pretty good idea this was not likely to be one of them. Nevertheless, this is the movie that launched her as an international sex symbol, and the source of the infamous loinskin bikini.

The title and poster art immediately make it apparent that intellectual rigour is not one of the film's strong points. After all, in one million BC there existed neither cavemen, nor dinosaurs. The dinosaurs having become extinct approximately 64 million years earlier, and cavemen not evolving from souped-up tree monkeys for at least another 800,000 years.

The salient point being that cavemen and dinosaurs never actually existed at the same time... in fact about 65 million years apart, which is no small mistake when you think about it. So the tagline of the poster "This is the way it was", is basically marketing bullshit of the highest order.

Still, if you can buy into a cavewoman looking like Raquel Welch, then your disbelief has already been well and truly suspended!

So about the movie ... the simplest summary would be to say it has a couple of things going for it, and they both belong to Raquel Welch. While that may be accurate, it's not the whole story. Coming out of the Hammer Studios in England, it's worthwhile remembering that this is a 45 year old movie. And for it's time, the creature effects by Ray Harryhausen must've been quite fantastic.

Even now, they look quite impressive at times - the stop-motion models look more realistic than what most CGI produces - although the motion of the beasts themselves is not so convincing. All the best-loved dinosaurs make an appearance: Brontosaurus, Triceratops, Tyrannosaurus Rex, even a clutch of Pterodactyls.

Filmed in the Canary Islands for that authentic dawn of the age of man vibe, the location lends the exterior scenes a measure of credibility. Unfortunately to modern eyes, most of the rest of the movie feels dated and fake. Had more attention been paid to realism, it may even have been possible to enjoy the movie for the thrill of seeing what caveman life would've been like. Instead the realism quotient is more along the lines of a Godzilla movie, and what charm remains, to moden sensibilities at least, is left entirely to Ms Welch.

On that point, you will not be disappointed. She definitely rocks the loin-skin and probably helped make the movie endurable for fathers taking their kids to the flicks all those years ago. Which must've been what happened, because the film was a commercial success.

Rating 4/10. Of interest to loinskin connoissuers only.

More screenshots

Cold Fish

2011-08-07T18:42:00.006+12:00

aka Tsumetai Nettaigyo
Japan, 2011
Director: Sion Sono
Starring: Denden, Makoto Ashikawa, Megumi Kagurazaka, Asuka Kurosawa

I've been a fan of director Sion Sono's films ever since Suicide Club introduced the world to his signature style. And his later effort, Strange Circus is one of my all-time favourite horror movies. If you're in the market for films inhabiting the twisted fringes of Japanese Horror cinema, or Ero Guro¹, Sono is your guy.

So it was with much anticipation that I caught his latest flick at a Film Festival this weekend. I was expecting something surreal and gory, and I knew it was based on a real-life serial killer. But what I didn't expect was the funniest movie I've seen this year.

That is, if you prefer your humour black. While it may seem unlikely, harvesting comedy from the serial killer sub-genre actually makes dark sense. Films such as Happiness of the Katakuris and American Psycho have mined this field before ... and Cold Fish is about as gut-wrenchingly hilarious as they get.

There's also a lot of blood. But where films such as Hostel could be categorised as gore for gore's sake, here it's employed in the service of humour, which is certainly the way I prefer it. Sono even manages to turn a rape scene into a comedic opportunity. And while that might sound quite twisted .... well yeah I guess it is. But its also deliriously, eye-wateringly funny.

If that isn't enough to satisfy your twisted sensibilities, this Japanese production also goes the extra mile that Hollywood rarely travels - by throwing in an abundance of sex and nudity as well. Considering most of the characters in the movie have little or no moral compunction, not only is life cheap, but sex is too.

Wanton licentiousness abounds - infidelity, partner-swapping, exhibitionism - even a charmingly cute lesbian interlude. All of which makes for the exact kind of envelope-pushing cinema pundits of Japanese genre movies will appreciate.

The humour is helped along substantially by ex-comedian Denden (Uzumaki, Juon) whose larger-than-life character dominates the film, as well as the characters within it. Charming and vicious by turns, his ebullient good-nature is infectious and infuses the film with dark humour.

Inspired by true events known as the "Saitama serial murders of dog lovers", the movie transposes proceedings to a pair of rival Tropical Fish shops, one run by the meek Shamato (Mitsuru Fukikoshi), the other by the gregarious Murata (Denden). Their paths cross when Shamato's daughter Mitsuko is caught shoplifting, and Murata suggests she come and work in his shop.

Murata is a wildly successful entrepreneur in stark contrast to Shamato. Irresistably charming, the Shamato family are quickly drawn into his web, with little realisation of the darker side to his personality. At least at first. But extricating themselves won't be so easy.

The film won't dazzle with its visuals or production values ... but has a tight script that builds momentum ensuring you'll barely notice its 2.5 hr running time. This is a definite highlight of the year for genre fans, and is highly recommended.

Rating: 9/10

More screenshots

For an interesting interview with the director, check out Channeling Chaos - An Interview with Sion Sono

Poll Results: Nicole Kidman

2011-07-13T02:20:00.002+12:00

Usually I don't like to be drawn into discussions on the imdb message boards - it seems most of the contributors are more concerned with trolling for arguments than having a lively discussion. Although it can be strangely entertaining reading through post after post of abuse and ethnic slurs!

However, I was reading up on the announcement that Park Chan-wook is chalked in to direct his first English-language movie. I was a bit concerned, as Park is one of my favorite directors, and things often don't end well when Asian directors try to operate within the confines of the Hollywood studio system.

Interestingly however, the film, called Stoker, is linked to Scott Free Productions which was formed by Ridley Scott (Alien, Bladerunner etc) and his brother Tony (True Romance). The studio behind it is Fox Searchlight - who specialise in independent and British cinema, and are currently promoting Terrence Malick's "Tree of Life" ... a film I'm looking forward to seeing this weekend. What's more, apparently the script is quite a hot property.

However, I quickly noticed the lead is Nicole Kidman. And I thought, oh no ....

I'm sure she's a fine actress and all ... but not exactly possessing of qualities I'd associate with the edgy side of world cinema. To me she spells boring and mainstream, while Park's movies I find exciting and edgy.

So yeah, that's my opinion anyway ... and I was pretty surprised to read a whole load of waffle on the imdb boards about how great it was that Kidman had been cast for this movie. Admittedly, some confessed to never having seen a Park Chan-wook movie, but wasn't it just great anyway!

So ... when I contributed my doubts on this casting, I was floored to receive a reply claiming that Nicole Kidman is the go-to actress for edgy cinema. Well, I couldn't disagree more really... so I created a poll and put it to the vote right here on the blog.

The results were:

1) Mainstream (57%)
2) Edgy (0%)
3) Sexy (28%)
4) Boring (14%)

Thanks to all that voted! The results speak for themselves, albeit from a decidedly limited sample population, and definitely from a skewed viewpoint ... being the readers of this twisted little blog! Anyway, glad to know I'm not alone.

But I'm still hoping that Kidman and Park can pull it off.

The Hokusai Manga

2011-05-04T03:07:00.008+12:00

aka Edo Porn
Japan, 1981

Director: Kaneto Shindô
Starring: Ken Ogata, Toshiyuki Nishida, Yûko Tanaka, Kanako Higuchi
IMDB: 7.1

Katsushika Hokusai was an Ukiyo-e (woodblock) artist in Japan's Edo period, most well known for his 36 Views of Mt Fuji, especially the iconic Great Wave off Kanagawa (shown below). In Japan this film is known as The Hokusai Manga, as the film is basically a historical drama about the artist's life and work.

If you're wondering how a historical drama fits under the auspices of this blog, note also that Hokusai is widely believed to be the originator of Tentacle Porn. And indeed, in the West the film is known as Edo Porn - which I guess neatly enfolds its key aspects, if somewhat simplistically. While Hokusai was known for much more than his erotic art, its the Tentacles that earn it a place here.

As a young man, unable to make a living for himself through his painting, Hokusai (Ken Ogata) envies the success of contemporaries who are painting erotic pictures. One evening he comes across a beautiful young woman, Onao (Kanako Higuchi), and brings her back to his house to pose naked for him.

In an example of the film's minimal exposition, its never explained why she so willingly, and wordlessly accompanies him. Even less so, why she happily complies when he gives her to his father as a gift! Her oddly accommodating nature, sexual availability, and a habit of noisily chewing a local fruit makes for a beguiling and enigmatic character, more than befitting the woman who was the artist's muse.

Nevertheless, Onao mysteriously disappears, and both Hokusai and his father are distraught. Especially Hokusai who spends the rest of his life yearning for her. Over the coming years, he returns to painting landscapes and enjoys great success, even being asked to paint for the Shogun. But by his twilight years is living in relative poverty with his daughter Oei (Yuko Tanaka).

One day, being a thoughtful and devoted daughter, she brings a young woman back to the house, also named Onao, to be a new model for her father. She's a dead-ringer for her namesake, and it seems has the same free-wheeling sexuality. With a new muse to inspire him, Hokusai resumes painting with renewed enthusiasm.

This brings about my favorite part of the film, a live-action re-enactment of his famous work The Dream of the Fisherman's Wife, which features his model in a highly erotic ménage à trois with two Octopi ¹. The original is shown below, along with its cinematic representation. Now there's something you're not likely to see at your local multiplex!

In the film, Hokusai makes it clear that his work does not represent Octopi violating a woman, but rather the woman fondling Octopi. Ie: This was not a rape scene as might commonly be imagined, but depicts a woman's sexual fantasy, a theme that Hokusai enjoyed exploring.

Let's say that if there were an Academy Award for Best Live-Action Tentacle Porn Sequence, then this film would surely own it. Although I can't profess to have seen much in this sub-genre, it certainly has way higher artistic validity than the tentacle-themed La Blue Girl series. But if any readers out there want to suggest another contender, please leave a comment.

For those interested in Japanese art and culture, this biopic gives an interesting account of the artist's life and the times that he lived in. Although slow and ponderous when judged by modern sensibilities, the film is thematically rich, covering themes such as aging, lost love, and the artistic impulse. It is also beautifully filmed, and filled with traditional Japanese art and architecture.

It has, however, been filmed with a distinctly Japanese style. A reliance on inference (also used in the Japanese way of speaking), makes it a little less accessible for western audiences more used to explicit plot definition. Even with the best of intentions, I found it a little confusing at times. Additionally, the make-up effects employed as the characters aged were less than convincing, but that's a minor gripe.

It was nominated in multiple categories at the Japanese Academy Awards, winning one. Perhaps the only instance of an Academy-Award winning film featuring Tentacle Porn!

Rating: 7/10

Unfortunately this is not an easy film to get hold of, however an R3 DVD has been released by Panorama in Hong Kong, and can be found at most online Asian DVD specialists.

¹ ref: the correct plural of Octopus

A few more screenshots

The first two are Yuko Tanaka, who won a Japanese Academy Award (Best supporting actress) for this film. The 3rd pic is Kanako Higuchi who unfortunately did not win an Academy Award for her valiant Octopi entanglement.

Japanese Movie Poster:

Preferring to accentuate the titillation over the art, this 1981 film poster is certainly a product of its time. Featured is Academy-Award-winning actress Kanako Higuchi who went on to feature in such films as Zatoichi, Casshern, Kagero and many others. Click here to see a larger version.

Braindead

2011-04-25T02:08:00.015+12:00

aka Dead Alive
New Zealand, 1992

Director: Peter Jackson
Starring: Timothy Balme, Diana Peñalver
IMDB: 7.6

Nowadays oscar-winning director Peter Jackson is best known for films such as Lord of the Rings, Heavenly Creatures, and King Kong. But back when he started his film career in New Zealand, he was the splatter king. This particular film concluded his early b-movie trilogy which includes his first two films Bad Taste and Meet the Feebles. Unfortunately this was to be his last foray in b-movie cinema as he moved on to larger, more commercial projects.

What these early features had in common was a low budget aesthetic combined with over the top gore and incredibly inventive effects. Brain Dead was filmed for only $3 million, and yet contains enough special effects for a movie with ten times the budget.

Despite the large amount of blood, brains, viscera and assorted many-hued body fluids on display, its definitely gore played for laughs - with a similar feel to Evil Dead II, Dellamorte Dellamore, or even Tokyo Gore Police. Jackson takes the zombie genre, and goes completely over the top with it. This is an incredibly funny movie - that is, if you're the kind of person that finds humour in zombies being taken down by garden implements with extreme prejudice.

The first half hour however is b-grade at best ... set in 1950's New Zealand, there is a distinct lack of glamour. No hardbody co-eds frolicking in the pool here! The backstory involves a zoo official collecting a rare Sumatran rat-monkey to bring back to New Zealand, despite strong disagreement from the local tribesmen.

Turns out they had good reason to object. This hybrid was conceived through the unlikely scenario of a giant rat raping a monkey, resulting in one evil motherfucking beast. Nevertheless, it takes up residence at the local zoo, and its not long before its zombie virus is unleashed.

Meanwhile we've been introduced to a range of strange characters, a love story is in progress, and the unlikely hero is rapidly maturing from bumbling nerd to ass-kicking zombie despatcher. The acting is quite woeful at times, but then its obvious that's not where the budget has been spent. Once the movie hits the last hour, it quickly gathers momentum with the body count accelerating exponentially. Before long we've descended into a balls-out orgy of zombie mayhem that may well be the single greatest achievement in zombie cinema.

Rating: 8/10

Japanese Movie Poster:

The Japanese movie poster is an awesome hand-drawn illustration of the film, and one of my favorite b-movie posters. Although it should be noted considerable license has been taken, as there are no characters in the film remotely resembling the attractive nurse depicted. Click here to see a larger version.

Zebraman 2: Attack on Zebra City

2011-03-15T04:17:00.004+13:00

Japan, 2010
Original title: Zeburâman: Zebura Shiti no gyakushû

Director: Takashi Miike
Starring: Shô Aikawa, Riisa Naka, Tsuyoshi Abe
IMDB: 7/10

Long-time fans of director Takashi Miike may regard the first Zebraman film as marking the end of the Miike golden period. Coming shortly after a rapid-fire sequence of surreal genre pieces (Gozu, Visitor Q, Happiness of the Katakuris) and hyper kinetic Yakuza epics (Ichi the Killer, Dead or Alive, Deadly Outlaw Rekka) ... it was a time when Miike was arguably the most exciting director on the world stage, at least for those of us inhabiting the more twisted fringes of the world cinema spectrum.

Consequently expectations were high, and Zebraman (Part 1) while able to ride on the Miike buzz, ultimately disappointed. It's not that it was a bad film, just that the films which preceded it were so good, and the paradigm shift to a less adult, and more commercial reality was somewhat at odds with his previous work, even considering the eclectic range of his output.

So its interesting that Miike has chosen 6 years later to revisit the franchise, based on the manga from Yamada Renji. This time around, perhaps due to adjusted expectations, the result seems more impressive. It's still firmly entrenched within a commercial framework, and targeted towards a younger demographic - but just maybe I've come to terms with that. The fact it reunites him with veteran Sho Aikawa (Zebraman, Gozu, Dead or Alive trilogy) and comes stocked with an array of leather-clad vixens is more than enough reason to check it out.

Zebraman 2 is an alien invasion movie set in a dystopian Tokyo future, with its central theme being the time honoured struggle between good and evil, in this case symbolically depicted as a fight between 'black and white'.

Taking the idea one step further, the film cleverly plays with the inherent visual dichotomy of the Zebra, its black and white stripes signifying the good and evil within us all and, more specifically, within Zebraman himself. This plot point is an opportunity to ramp up the sexiness, exploiting the decadence of the black side of the stripe.

Ostensibly a superhero movie, the film plays like a combination of Cutie Honey, Tokyo Gore Police, and Godzilla-sized monster mayhem. All of which unfolds with Miike's typical irreverence and disregard for linear plot exposition. The abundance of crazy ideas thrown into the mix makes for a somewhat confusing first half-hour ... but hang in there, it all makes sense in the end (however absurd).

Tokyo 2025 has been renamed 'Zebra City', complete with a striped force-field defining its boundaries, and a tacit acknowledgment of the need for both good and evil within. Those in power are permitted to commit crimes for 10 minutes each day with impunity, a thinly-disguised attempt to thin the population via survival of the fittest.

Mayor Aihara Kozou, complete with bowler hat and mascara a la Clockwork Orange, enforces his dictates with the aid of stormtroopers and a select personal guard called the Zebra Police, or as he calls them 'The miniskirts'. As the name suggests, they are decked out in leather miniskirts, heels and fishnets (all black, of course), a darker version of Japan's legendary Miniskirt Police.

Which brings us to the Zebra Queen, Aihara Yui played by fashion model Riisa Naka - formed from pure evil by her creator Mayor Aihara who tweaked her appearance by specifying "larger breasts" and a "tighter ass" if you please!

A psychotic sadist, being pure evil after all, Riisa hams it up as a nasty little bitch. Her day job is as a J-pop artist, cavorting lasciviously in black leather and lingerie, spreading her own sexy brand of debauched propaganda and mind control. Obviously she looks the part, and with an eye-popping selection of clothes and wigs makes for a super-sexy villain.

Although the film comes across at times like a family-style blockbuster ... Miike never seems quite able to reign in his twisted ideas long-enough to call the film truly family-friendly - at least not what would be considered as such outside of Japan.

So while we have a cute young girl as the damsel in distress, we also have sly scenes of perverse sexuality ... a nurse tweaks the nipples of a male doctor as he pours hot wax on a patient, our titular hero gives the blowjob of the century to dispose of a menacing alien, and the Zebra Queen has quite the propensity to end up with her legs spread at any given opportunity. And that's not to mention the director's little joke as one scene threatens to enter tentacle-porn territory, only to smoothly segue into innocent playfulness.

While Miike has always operated within the limited budgets that most Japanese movies strain under compared to their Hollywood counterparts, this in no way reigns in his ambition ... which often seems many times the budget he has available. How good the film looks is testament to his skill at stretching his Yen - although whatever budget he has seems never quite enough to fully realise the richness of his vision.

Maybe lacking the budget for reshoots, tweaks or fine-tuning, he turns budget shortfalls into an opportunity for B-grade schlock. The occasional cheapo effects are played for laughs, and not incongruously with the tone. Miike films it and moves on - and this is much of the charm of his movies. They're dense bursts of creativity, generally uninhibited by restriction - be it money, good taste or common filmic convention.

Film connoisseurs might well describe the film as silly and inane, not without justification, but fans of this absurdist Japanese style will know that's exactly the point. I'd personally have preferred a more adult tone though. The sex is throttled back to multiplex-friendly allusions when my preference would've been more exploitative ... but that's just my admittedly twisted personal viewpoint.

In recommendation, I enjoyed it a lot and laughed often. It won't be showing up in many best-of lists ... but where else will you see a godzilla-sized cutesy green alien stomping through Tokyo and blowing enemies away with well-directed blasts of flatulence! Yes its that kind of movie, and it deserves to be seen, at least once.

Rating: 7/10

XX: Beautiful Hunter

2011-01-18T20:07:00.025+13:00

Japan, 1994
Original title: XX: Utsukushiki karyuudo

Director: Masaru Konuma
Starring: Makiko Kuno, Koji Shimizu, Johnny Okura, Katsuo Tokashi
IMDB: 4.5

In a culture where women are traditionally demure and reserved, its surprising how many Japanese movies feature strong-willed women kicking ass! This lethality combined with femininity is a potent combination, and perhaps goes some way to explaining the increasing popularity of Japanese exploitation.

The rampant nudity doesn't hurt either, of course ... something notably missing from most Hollywood action flicks (which is kinda strange given that males must surely be the target audience). But that's another story ... here we have a Japanese exploitation flick that ticks all the right boxes for its intended audience. And what might that be? Well, take a closer look at the DVD cover above...

Masaru Konuma was a prolific director of Pinku films in the 1970s, including titles such as (the original) Flower & Snake, and Wife to be Sacrificed, often with an S&M theme and highly sexualized. This direct-to-video action film from 1994, towards the end of the director's career, retains a sexy and perverse aesthetic that will be of interest to genre fans, and in particular Girls with Guns aficionados.

The film opens inside a convent, where the young orphan Shion is forced to execute a man at the prompting of the Father (Koji Shimizu) - part of her training to become a Holy Warrior. Exactly what the Holy Warriors are supposed to be fighting for or against, is never really explained - although the Father's modus operandi seems closer to the Yakuza than the Holy Roman Church, perhaps indicating that the church is itself little more than a Yakuza front.

Cut to 10 years later, and Shion (Makiko Kuno) has grown up. The director's method of visually portraying this fact is the epitome of elegant simplicity ... the gratuitous boob shot! And we only had to wait 4 mins and 43 seconds.

She is now the group's most accomplished assassin, and it's during one of her jobs that photographer Ito (Johnny Okura) secretly captures her on film executing one of his colleagues. Shion quickly realizes the threat he poses and hunts him down intending to kill him. However, a chance remark from Ito exposes the vulnerable and needy side of the young woman ... she has never had a boyfriend. And she's horny!

Ito-san is a smooth dude with a penchant for white suits, and while kneeling at her feet begging for his life, he manages to save himself through the remarkable technique of ripping her clothes off and administering a little oral gratification! Poor Shion is in two minds ... she knows she needs to kill him, and her boss is insisting upon it ... and yet it seems she has fallen in love.

On returning home her mind wanders back to Ito as she proceeds to masturbate with her gun. While this may seem like a cheap and gratuitous excuse to show more nudity, this subtle scene actually contains many shades of allegorical meaning that poignantly foreshadow Shion's change of heart.

In addition to being a cheap and gratuitous excuse to show more nudity!

However, as previously foreshadowed, Shion decides to follow her heart and goes on the run with Ito to escape her boss. Said boss however, is not likely to let her off that easy.

If you thought the film was freaky enough up to this point, well that's just the first half hour. What follows are more killings, more sex, more nudity, and some fairly exploitative S&M-based torture featuring foreign objects and the indiscriminate placement thereof.

All in all its a good time. Which is not to say that its a great film. Other reviewers have noted that without the beautiful Makiko Kuno in the title role, the film has little to offer. Admittedly, Makiko is a total sex-bomb and is often naked - elevating the film considerably with her looks alone.

But to say that the film would suck without her, would be equally unfair. This is a competent action flick - while not overly deep, how many action flicks are? It also features some creative photography - with certain scenes featuring fantastic Girls with Guns imagery.

On the downside, its quickly apparent that this is a film from the 80s, despite being made in 1994. The music, the clothes, the hair - all seem quite dated. But give yourself 15 minutes to settle into the groove and you won't really be noticing. Also, true genre-fiends should note that this is Japsploitation-lite in comparison to much else in the genre.

6.5/10

More screenshots (click to enlarge)

Abashiri Family

2011-01-07T02:34:00.007+13:00

Japan, 2009
Original title: Abashiri Ikka: The movie

Director: Teruyoshi Ishii
Starring: Erica Tonoka, Mai Endo, Teppei Enomoto, Kenji Goda
IMDB: Not yet rated

The Abashiri Family is a live-action adaptation of the Go Nagai manga. If that name sounds familiar, even to non-manga fans, its because he's a bit of a legend, and so many of his works have been made into movies. For instance Cutie Honey, Devilman, Kekko Kamen, Maboroshi Panty, Mazinger Z and more.

According to Nagai's IMDB bio, it lists his trademark as "Likes to put in as much nudity, sexual and scatological material as he can to see what he can get away with.". Righto! Now that we've established tonal context ...

Unfortunately, this outing is not so perverse ... however it does succeed in continuing his tradition of over-the-top craziness that I've come to love in Japanese cinema.

The Abashiri Family are a nasty bunch of criminals, presided over by their patriarch Daemon. There is Goemon the pervert, Naojiro the cyborg, Kichiza the bomb specialist, and the sexy daughter Kikunosuke (J-idol Erica Tonoka).

They live in an outlaw city at the foot of Mt Fuji called the Nippon Extra-Territory, where they have a long-running feud with a rival crime family. Unbeknownst to the Abashiri's, their rivals have contrived to have them implanted with special 'anti-crime' chips that immobilise them whenever a criminal thought enters their head.

With this advantage, the rival clan hopes to exterminate the Abashiri's once and for all - but it won't be that easy! Both clan partriarchs have magical powers, and the daughters have the obligatory ass-kicking martial arts skills. Throw in some chanbara-style swordplay and you've got all the traditional elements of the modern Japanese live-action flick.

Fans of B-grade J-Mayhem will know not to expect a huge budget, and so it is with this entry. It's obviously low budget and the cheap-ass special effects are especially cheesy. Nonetheless there are also some surprisingly effective scenes.

What this film adds to the mix, is what is so often missing from this kind of fare - laughs. When you've only got a small budget and are going for a b-movie vibe, you need to add one or more of a) Laughs, b) Boobs, or c) Scares. Sorry to say there's no boobs or scares here ... but there are plenty enough laughs to make up for it. This is no doubt helped along by the seasoned acting skills of the two patriarchs, who add a semblance of quality to proceedings.

The eye-candy factor is provided by J-idol Erica Tonoka in her feature debut, and she's as cute as you'd expect. She also gets to wield a katana in her school uniform and get covered in blood - as you probably also expected. What you might not have expected is that she is surprisingly funny, with what seems a natural gift for comedy.

When all is said and done, this is a cheapo b-grade comedy from Japan. But as far as such things go, its a pretty good one. I laughed out loud throughout, and so found it easier to overlook some of the film's shortcomings. If you're in the mood for a bit of light-hearted Japanese madness, I recommend giving it a blast.

Rating: 6/10

Angst

2010-12-23T02:33:00.002+13:00

aka Fear
Austria, 1983

Director: Gerald Kargl
Starring: Erwin Leder, Robert Hunger-Bühler, Silvia Rabenreither
IMDB: 7.7

Generally I am a fan of 'psycho killer' movies. Why? Usually for their black humour (Eg: American Psycho, Edmond) or for great acting (Silence of the Lambs). But also I admit to deriving some measure of perverse glee in watching the average Joe take out his rage on society at large in an uncontrolled release of vented frustration.

I mean, who doesn't travel partway along this road from time to time? Luckily most people have a well-conditioned moral centre, reason, and humanity which when combined with the fear of punishment usually ensures that most of us don't go much further than issuing juicy invective in a non-specific direction.

Which is to say that part of the attraction surely lies in the vicarious thrill engendered through watching films where the chief protagonist, for whatever reason, has no such compulsions holding them back. We can enjoy the movie in full knowledge that we ourselves would never cross this line. It may even be somewhat cathartic. And undoubtedly the enjoyment of such movies can be justified, safe in the knowledge that it's "just a movie" after all.

Angst however, is perhaps not "just a movie" being loosely based on the real-life serial killer Werner Kniesek, who was arrested in 1980 after savagely butchering three people in Salzburg, Austria. Additionally, the film's dialogue is entirely in voice-over, telling us "The Psychopath's" inner feelings as he awaits release from jail the next day, eager to resume his sado-sexual killings at the first opportunity, and then following him as he is released from prison with just one thing on his mind. Much of his dialogue is quoted directly from interviews with real-life serial killers including the Vampire of Dusseldorf, Peter Kürten.

What we have here then, is not the typical glossy Hollywood version of a Psycho Killer, nor a stylised cliche - but an altogether more realistic, and therefore far more disturbing one.

Erwin Leder's portrayal of The Psychopath eschews the smooth, calculating and urbane exteriors of characters such as Hannibal Lecter and Patrick Bateman in favor of a more vile and pitiful characterisation, along similar lines as Ted Levine's turn as Buffalo Bill in Silence of the Lambs. He is shown to be chaotic, paranoid, repulsive, and surprisingly ineffective. Basically, pretty fucked up.

Despite being the central character, he is not one you can identify with or root for. Nonetheless we are forced into his world, and into his head, through the aforementioned voice-over and also through some outstanding camerawork from Zbigniew Rybczynski. The camera takes a floating position somewhat to the side and above the psychopath, rarely leaving him as we are forced to look downwards and watch as events unfold. At other times the camera is employed in a shaky hand-held style, or situated directly behind the actor's head. Interestingly, during the psychopath's best moments, the camera switches position to floor-level, looking up at him looming large, reflecting the state of his ego.

The final part of the equation is the score provided by noted German composer Klaus Schulze. Taking into consideration that this was 1983, the score is eerily fitting and brings to mind Giorgio Moroder's work on Cat People. Ie: It's easily identifiable as "early 80's" with its droning synth lines. This does however add a specific feel to proceedings that suit the time and place of the movie.

Technically speaking this is an interesting film, but due to its realistic and downbeat nature looks low-budget, despite the creativity employed. But then viewers expecting Pirates of the Caribbean production values aren't likely to track down an obscure Austrian film from 1983!

Knowing in advance that French director Gaspar Noe (Irreversible, Enter the Void) has explicitly named this film as an influence, you will have little trouble seeing why. Noe's trademark swooping camera in Irreversible was distinctly foreshadowed here, as was the almost first-person view he used in "Enter the Void".

Which brings us tidily into another Noe comparison for those who recall the infamous brutal rape of Monica Bellucci in his film Irreversible. Let's just say that Noe's version is the tamer one! It is no wonder that director Gerald Kargl had immense trouble getting the film distributed, and even today it is not easy to find. As one IMDB reviewer put it so well, "It makes The Silence of the Lambs and Seven look like kindergarten stuff."

For fans of true crime, and anyone seeking a more authentic psycho killer experience this surely rates as one of the most successful of its type. It's nasty, it's seedy, it's disturbing - just like the crime itself. What was the film's biggest downfall is also its greatest asset - it's honest. Brutally so.

Rating: 7/10. For horror connoisseurs only.

Spanking Love

2010-11-29T21:15:00.012+13:00

Japan, 1995
Director: Shoji Tanaka
Starring: Toshio Kakei, Yoshiko Yura, Kumi Shiraishi, Renji Ishibashi
IMDB: 4.3

Japan seems to crank out a fair few BDSM-themed movies which is perhaps a reflection of a less repressed sexual culture. While I've never been tempted to explore this lifestyle myself, I love the visuals of it all ... the leather, the heels, the fishnets. Simply put, the dominatrix archetype is sexy!

Which is why I initially picked this one up without really knowing what to expect. The cover features an artfully photographed leather-clad vixen, with the effect spoiled by a terribly amateur choice of font for the film's title. This one could go either way...

Previous forays into Japanese exploitation have revealed not a small amount of artistry mixed with their erotica (See School of the Holy Beast, Tokyo Decadence), and so it is here.

The story is in effect a drama, set within the Japanese BDSM underworld. Mr Okunogi (Renji Ishibashi) is a rich businessman with masochistic desires - Ie: he gets off on being dominated into submission by sexy young women. However, he utilises his wealth and power in a sadistic manner to force his "Queens" to stay around. This is an irony he recognises, noting that sadism and masochism are two sides of the same coin.

And so it is that we meet Ryo (Toshio Kakei), an S&M movie director and his girlfriend Mayumi (Kumi Shiraishi) who also happens to be Okunogi's current Queen. Mayumi is desperate to escape Okunogi's control after seeing another girl driven to commit suicide after being raped at the club.

Ryo and Mayumi hatch a plan to make some money and escape to Hawaii, after Okunogi develops an obsession with Ryo's newest starlet Yumie (Yoshiko Yura). He had filmed her taking a vicious spanking, all the while retaining an enigmatic twinkle in her eye, and enjoying the experience immensely. Okunogi saw something in those eyes, and had to have her as his new Queen. What's more, he was prepared to pay top dollar if Ryo could get her down to the club.

What follows is a character-driven drama with some artistic set-pieces livening up proceedings. Much of the action takes place in an S&M themed club populated with various chains/ restraints, a fat guy in a cage, naked dancers, a bunch of half naked male submissives, and of course the dominatrixes strutting about with their whips.

The dancers were a highlight and do a few expressionistic dances, but overall the club felt more like a cheaply-staged set.

On the plus side, Yoshiko Yura is gorgeous and Renji Ishibashi puts in a fine performance. Extra points are awarded for the attempt to raise the film from cheap exploitation, with some very stylish visuals and a storyline that aims for more deeply realised characters. But ultimately the lack of budget lets it down.

Spanking Love may be of slight interest to BDSM enthusiasts, but everyone else should skip it.

Rating: 5/10 (but nice try)

Note: Wikipedia mentions that Issei Sagawa (Japan's notorious cannibal) features in this movie in what seems a dubious casting decision, to say the least.

Update from Tokyo - Takashi Ishii's A Night in Nude Sequel

2010-09-22T03:02:00.014+12:00

If you're wondering why there's been so little activity here at Twisted Flicks recently, its because I'm currently soaking up the atmosphere on holiday in Japan. As you can imagine, there's many better things to do here than blogging!

However, while cycling around Tokyo today, my attention was grabbed by some advertising adorning a streetside clock for the movie Hana to Hebi 3 (Flower and Snake 3).

It's a little surreal seeing advertising for a bondage movie right out in the street like this - and Ginza is not at all a seedy neighbourhood! Its where all the luxury shops are, with the likes of Luis Vuitton, Chanel, Armani etc.

Intrigued, I followed the arrows and came across a grimy movie theatre below the street, the Ginza Cine Patos.

An LCD screen on the wall was showing trailers for upcoming attractions ... and one that caught my eye was the Japanese trailer shown below for Takashi Ishii's Nûdo no yoru: Ai wa oshiminaku ubau - aka 'A Night in Nude' Vol 2 - a sequel to his highly acclaimed 1993 flick. Thought some of you fellow J-Cinema fans might be interested. Looks to be starting its theatrical run in Japan, Oct 2nd, 2010.

Trailer (Japanese only)

And for those that can read Japanese, here's the official website.

News

2010-08-08T01:41:00.006+12:00

Scroll down to view the trailers or click any cover to go direct.

Cold Fish - Sion Sono

I've been a fan of Sono since his film Suicide Circle, consider his following film Strange Circus to be a masterpiece, and his most recent 4hr epic Love Exposure was a fan hit worldwide. Now we have his latest flick, Cold Fish, based on the true story of a psychotic tropical fish shop owner. This one has already picked up numerous awards and sounds like it will be another remarkable entry in the director's catalog.

Big Tits Zombie 3D

Retro grindhouse comes to Japan! This has got to be my favorite exploitation movie title of the year ... big tits, zombies, 3D! What's not to love? Great trailer too. Film stars Sola Aoi, Risa Kasumi and a bevy of other assumedly well-endowed J-Idols.

Mutant Girls Squad

"The story is sort of a spoof of X-Men. [Yumi] Sugimoto plays Rin, a bullied teenager who discovers her arm has mutated into a razor-sharp weapon on her 16th birthday. A shadow government organization immediately begins hunting her down, slaughtering her parents in the process, but Rin is saved in the nick of time by a super-powered being called 'Hiruko'. Soon, mutants from all over Japan are gathered together and begin militant training to overthrow the government. Meanwhile, Rin is fitted with a special iron mask and begins her life as a 'battle girl', utilizing both her mutant powers and acrobatic abilities to fight against mutant-hunting special forces.". O......K

Gothic & Lolita Psycho

The film stars actress and gravure idol Rina Akiyama as Yuki, a girl who lives at home in peace until one day a unit of assassins breaks in and slaughters her mother. In order to reveal the truth behind the seemingly senseless murder, Yuki transforms herself into a demon of vengeance by donning gothic lolita clothing, wielding a parasol as a deadly weapon, and executing the guilty in the name of God. With special effects by Yoshihiro Nishimura (Tokyo Gore Police and most of the other recent films in the new wave of Japanese Gore confection).

And Soon the Darkness

A remake of the 1970 British cult thriller. Two American girls set out on a bike-riding trip in a remote part of Argentina. When one goes mysteriously missing, the other must find her before her worst fears are realised. I've got no legitimate reason for looking forward to this aside from the fact that it stars two upcoming starlets we saw this year, Odette Yustman (The Unborn) and Amber Heard (The Informers). To be honest, the best I'm hoping for is a worthy addition to the 'hot bikini chicks in peril' sub-genre ... but you never know!

A Night in Nude 2

Teruo Ishii's sequel to his acclaimed pinku.

Raped by Satan - 18 Feb 2010

Wow, here's a new horror flick from Indonesia that sounds a lot nastier than the trailer would indicate. Actually looks to be a fun horror movie, but what a title!!

Kain Kafan Perawan (Shroud of the Virgin)

Released 25 Feb 2010. Rasty and her friends are making a home made video clip in a railway station. While shooting the video, something happens and they found demons appearing in the video.

Suster Keramas

J-idol Rin Sakuragi plays a pornstar in this new horror from Indonesia. Can't tell you too much more about it yet.

Hantu Puncak Datang Bulan (The Menstruating Puncak Ghost)

Another indonesian sex horror, starring actress Andi Soraya and dangdut singing group Trio Macan. Seems to have caused a bit of a furore in muslim circles in Indonesia, and was banned.

“The movie contains porn, which can trigger lust and, based on our research, it also contains violence,” Amirsyah Tambunan from the MUI told Kompas.com.

Secret Undercover Agent: Wildcats in Strip Royale

Starring Japanese gravure idols Kadena Reon and Morishita Yuri fighting crime in skintight catsuits, and featuring strippers, schoolgirls and acres of ludicrously hot women. What's not to love?

This is a sequel to Secret Undercover Agent: Honey & Bunny (Himitsu Sennyuu Sousakan).

Check out the awesome trailer.

Enter the Void

2010-07-26T16:35:00.026+12:00

France, 2009
Director: Gaspar Noe
Starring: Paz de la Huerta, Nathaniel Brown
IMDB: 7.4

I'm going to cut straight to the chase. Enter the Void is a downright masterpiece, it simply pushes all the right buttons ... for me. I could say your mileage may vary, but I'll go a step further. Your mileage WILL vary, and I'll explain why shortly. Enter the Void is an edgy, experimental, visceral, mind-blowing experience that will more than polarise audiences, so uncompromising is director Gaspar Noe in his vision.

Anyone familiar with Noe's last film Irreversible will be aware he is not one to shy away from shocking the viewer - in fact its something that he strives for. It's safe to say he has not chosen to change his ways here! This is a truly adult movie ... and anyone with hangups about sex, drugs, or violence should stay well away. An open adult mind is a prerequisite.

The film wastes no time in establishing the impact it intends - right from the get-go the opening titles slam into the screen in rapid-fire succession accompanied by a suitably pounding soundtrack. These were impressive enough to be followed by excited applause at the festival premier I attended. The crowd were in high spirits, ready to laugh and interact with the movie in true festival tradition. But it wasn't long before everyone was deadly silent as they were gripped by the intensity of what was unfolding.

Enter the Void is based in Tokyo, and centers around siblings Oscar and Linda. After losing their parents at a very early age the two become extremely close, and Linda makes Oscar promise never to leave her. Nevertheless, they are fostered out to separate homes, and when we first meet Oscar he is living in Tokyo, desperately trying to raise the money to allow his sister to join him.

Being a bit of a drug fiend, its not long before he hits upon the obvious way to raise a bit of quick money - dealing drugs. In the seedy underbelly of Tokyo, in a country notoriously anti-drugs ... this is a dangerous proposition.

The first major scene of the movie involves Oscar (Nathaniel Brown) getting high on DMT. The sound, visuals and atmosphere of this scene are the most impressive translation of a hallucinogenic experience that I have ever seen in a movie. Noe has stated that his inspiration for the film's neon look came from his experimentation with the drug DMT / Ayahuasca - and for what its worth, he compares the effect to the movie Tron.

And its Noe's extraordinary success in representing this state of mind that will turn off many viewers. It's all a bit vague, blurry, and disorienting ... the film fully immerses you in the trip, and is in no great hurry to bring you back down again.

The viewer is taken on a wonderfully psychedelic joyride both inside and outside of Oscar's mind, and into and out of The Void. The visuals are spectacular, thanks in part to the design input of Marc Caro (Delicatessen, City of Lost Children), and the camera takes an almost first person perspective being firmly located just behind Oscar's head for most of the film's run time.

The plot makes use of concepts from the Tibetan Book of the Dead, a text that describes the state of consciousness after death, and explicitly compares the experience to the effects of the drug DMT (a well-known effect of the drug). To say more will require entering spoiler territory, suffice to say that this metaphysical idea is fully explored as a major concept of the movie.

Once Linda (Paz de la Huerta) arrives in Tokyo, she soon discovers the easiest way for an attractive young foreign woman to earn a living in a city where western women are very popular. The neon visuals of the strip bar she works in segue seamlessly into the previously mentioned psychedelic motif, and the leggy lead actress throws all modesty to the wind in an extremely brave performance.

Which brings us to the sex. There is quite a lot of it, and its reasonably explicit. Explicit enough to warrant a hefty adult rating anyway. Especially when Noe's swooping camera travels room to room through a love hotel, an idea that would have been utterly exploitational and voyeuristic were it not for the integral plot detail that it served.

As mentioned earlier, Noe is no stranger to hitting the viewer between the eyes with visceral and explosive violence. Some scenes had the impact, almost literally, of being hit in the face with a sledgehammer. This is an aspect of the movie that would surely be best experienced in a theater.

Noe takes his trademark floating camera aesthetic to new heights of excellence here, in combination with some remarkable CGI. This technique caused a lot of excitement when used in Irreversible, but here is used to much greater effect, especially as this time its not just a method but perhaps the best way to portray the story. Some scenes are absolutely breathtaking in scope, and while I was too busy enjoying the ride to bother with technical analysis, I am quite certain that some of these scenes were actually impossible. No doubt the eventual DVD will explain how it was done, and would be fascinating in itself.

The sound of the movie likewise fits the surreal and psychedelic tone, but more in the way David Lynch will use sounds to engender an emotional response without the explicit use of songs per se.

I've not wanted to give too much away in this review, but I hope it comes across just what an ambitious film this is. Noe takes the viewer on a roller-coaster experience in more ways than one, and here 'experience' is the key word. The only criticism I could make of the movie is that at times it is slow and occasionally repetitive. But in this regard it is worthwhile to note that one of Noe's biggest influences for this movie was Kubrick's 2001. Another movie with lengthy non-verbal sequences. It seems quite experimental in nature - you need to let it wash over you, immerse yourself in the alternate realities it presents.

To quote Hunter S. Thompson ... "Buy the ticket, take the ride" and catch it on the big screen if at all possible.

34% of viewers on IMDB rate Enter The Void a 10/10 ... I'm one of them.

Postscript: To learn more about the drug DMT, and why neuroscientists and psychologists are studying its effects, check out the documentary DMT: The Spirit Molecule. This provides great insight into what Noe was trying to achieve with this film.

Trailer

Get another opinion

@ Axe Wound. A great review with more details of the plot.
@ The Playlist. For the opposing viewpoint (beware, spoilers)

Movie of the Year 2010

2010-07-26T11:00:00.003+12:00

Last night I saw what I have little doubt will be my movie of the year. A twisted, visceral, mind-blowing experience with huge ambitions that no doubt will prove far too edgy for the Oscars. Even though its still only July, I really can't imagine it being bettered - even with Robert Rodriguez' Machete looking extremely promising. And no, it wasn't Inception! Review coming soon.

Fathom

2010-07-18T14:55:00.015+12:00

United Kingdom, 1967
Director: Leslie H. Martinson
Starring: Raquel Welch, Tony Franciosa
IMDB: 5.7

Raquel Welch was perhaps the most popular female sex symbol of the 60s and 70s, and its not hard to see why. But because this was before my time, I've been searching for her defining moment - one that utilizes her considerable charms within the context of a great movie.

This is proving to be a challenge, as the films I've seen so far seem somewhat dated now, and whether they were ever regarded as 'quality' films to begin with is up for debate. However, the search continues, and if any readers have suggestions to make, please speak up!

Fathom is a James Bond style action parody, that seems to serve little greater purpose than as a vehicle to get Raquel into her bikini. In this regard, the film achieves its aims with considerable success. According to other reviewers more acquainted with her body of work, this movie was the most effective at showcasing the Welch phenomenon.

The film's original marketing displayed no great subtlety, and to their credit was pretty accurate in encapsulating its selling point. Words carefully tailored to hint at the attractions you would experience included - "The World's most uncovered undercover agent!", "She's a sky diving darling built for action!", 'There's two types of women - all the others, and Raquel Welch."

Admirably enough, the film wastes little time delivering on the promises made in its marketing. The very first thing we see after the studio logo is a slow horizontal pan close-up of Raquel (in bikini of course) from her toes up to her head. Followed soon after by a glamor shot as she tosses her windswept hair to the accompaniment of her name in extra large type. This must have been quite the impressive entrance when viewed on the big screen!

As for the rest of the film, well I guess it's of interest as an example of late 60s fluff. There's some nice locations (it was filmed in Spain), and the requisite action sequences featuring boats, planes, trains, helicopters, cars and even a bullfighting sequence. All of which are a pale imitation of the James Bond formula, although as a parody this can perhaps be justified.

Despite my overall impression of vapidity, there is actually a convoluted storyline involved, and the ever-present dry British humor helps things along, although its fairly tame by today's standards. Like when one actor pushes Raquel up against a tree and pulls her close she exclaims "Is that really absolutely necessary Merriweather?", to which he replies "Shhh, I'm protecting you."

However, and to be fair, the film's creators were no doubt concentrating more on their film's major asset. To this end, Raquel sports numerous sexy outfits, swans about in her lime-green bikini, gets to brandish a gun, and jumps out of planes and stuff. It goes without saying that the hair department earned their keep ensuring no strand of Raquel's hairdo was harmed during filming.

As also witnessed in Hannie Caulder (review here), there is not much effort to hide the movie's leering intent. Actors can at times be seen concentrating more on ogling Raquel's curves than on their lines, and the director is not shy of choosing the exploitational camera angle.

There's even a pretty funny moment when Raquel first appears in her green bikini - one of the actors exclaims something that sounds like 'Wa-pow!' - which I assume by the accompanying expression of the actor concerned roughly translates to 'Hubba Hubba'. Indeed.

Overall, I found this a bit of a chore to sit through ... obviously there is the Welch factor to redeem it, but the rest of the movie I found dated and of no great interest. Not particularly bad, but not good either - and definitely not my style.

I'd say this movie would chiefly be of interest to fans of the actress, rather than any inherent qualities of the film itself. Raquel also gets more than her usual share of dialogue, and gets to show her value as a comedic actress (not bad), and an action star (not so much).

Rating: 4/10

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The Assassin Next Door

2010-07-16T03:01:00.015+12:00

Original title: Kirot

Israel, 2009

Director: Danny Lerner

Starring: Olga Kurylenko, Ninette Tayeb, Liron Levo
IMDB: 6.2

A while back there was a media buzz surrounding Olga Kurylenko due to her stint as a Bond girl in Quantum of Solace. Bond movies are not my bag, so I never really knew what the fuss was all about. However, I did catch her in a few smaller roles, none of which left a particularly lasting impression.

That all changed with Kirot, which I decided to check out based purely on the fact that the storyline centred around an ass-kicking revenge-fueled female assassin. Bring it on! The first lasting impression gleaned from Kirot is that Ms Kurylenko is quite nice looking. Closely followed by the second lasting impression - she is one terrific actress.

Both of these details are important here, because Kirot is undeniably the Kurylenko show. She eats up the vast majority of the film's screen time, and the rest of the characters are little more than bit-players in this gritty revenge flick.

We first meet Galia (Kurylenko) in an Israeli whorehouse, struggling to fix a smile on her face for the paying customers, much to the chagrin of her 'owner' Roni (Levo). He paid top dollar for her, and as far as he is concerned he owns both her pussy and her soul. But Galia is no wallflower, and spying an opportunity to escape, she takes it.

Unfortunately she does not get very far, and is savagely beaten on capture. With her owners realising they'll need to recoup their investment another way, they press her into service as a contract assassin. With no money and no passport - she has little option but to agree, being strung along with the promise of her freedom once the 'next' job is completed.

She is given her own apartment, and its not long before she strikes up a friendship with the Jewish girl next door, Elinor (Tayeb), who suffers constant physical abuse from her asshole husband. In fact, almost all the men in this film are very violent to women, and its no wonder that the two women seek solace in each other. Well ... not *that* kind of solace - not explicitly at least. Although it certainly seems to be simmering close beneath the surface of their outwardly platonic relationship.

Which brings us to the tone of the film - distinctly neither exploitational nor escapist, despite the subject matter. Aside from the unlikelihood of a 100lb supermodel taking down a group of Israeli gangsters, the film grounds itself in a gritty reality. The violence is brutal, and the characterisations, motivations and actions of the characters are given a distinctly human aspect.

Although to be fair, the 100lb supermodel comment is not really justified. Sure, that's how she looks - but Kurylenko brings a fierce and determined steel to her character that results in no jarring incongruity with her ass-kicking exploits. And while there is certainly action and brutality aplenty, there is also equal parts human drama, allowing Kurylenko to show she's far more than just a pretty face.

Colour me totally impressed ... Kurylenko is a star on the rise.

The dialog is spoken in Hebrew, Russian and stilted English ... meaning practically everyone will be watching this with subtitles. Consequently it may well struggle to find wide exposure, and the dramatic aspect may not suit the average action fan. Nevertheless, the film is well worth checking out for Kurylenko's star performance.

Rating: 7/10

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Trailer

Vanilla Sky

2010-06-06T02:39:00.007+12:00

USA, 2001

Director: Cameron Crowe
Starring: Tom Cruise, Penelope Cruz, Cameron Diaz, Kurt Russell, Jason Lee, Tilda Swinton
IMDB: 6.9

Hollywood remakes of foreign films often suck - they take a great film, dumb it down, take out the good bits, and apply the usual Hollywood formula to excrete a pale imitation of the original.

The film that Vanilla Sky is based on, Alejandro Amenabar's Abre los Ojos (Open Your Eyes) is one of my all-time favourite films. And amazingly, so is this. Cameron Crowe took the opportunity to not only remake the movie, but to enhance it as well.

What Crowe brings to the table (aside from translating it from the original Spanish into English) is markedly improved visuals, a killer soundtrack, a large ensemble cast, and a further layering of the plot's surreal aspects. The only downside to this version, in my opinion, is the casting of Tom Cruise in the lead role, whose acting is less realistic than that of Eduardo Noriega in the original. However, as his character is rich, superficial, and arrogant - it's a character-type that Cruise plays well. (Like he did in Magnolia)

When this film was made, complex twisted plots were enjoying huge popularity (Eg: Fight Club, Mulholland Drive, Donnie Darko, Memento). Vanilla Sky very much fits into this style of film-making, being a film with an intelligent science fiction plot, and a density of ideas that only multiple viewings fully reveal.

It also has a distinctly surreal and dream-like atmosphere, which absolutely fits the script once you realise what the film is actually about (which for most viewers would be towards the end of the film).

Being a remake, Crowe can't take credit for the plot, but the main storyline is an incredibly unique and original idea, and in my opinion one of the best sci-fi scripts in recent times.

David Aames (Cruise) is a good looking rich kid who has inherited his father's company and breezes through life with the kind of nonchalance that fabulous wealth affords. Of course he has no trouble with the ladies, and is currently banging his fuck buddy, Julie Gianni (Diaz), not realising that she's taking it much more seriously than he is.

"You fucked me four times last night David. You've been inside me, I've swallowed your cum. That means something!", she shrieks upon discovering that he now has a new infatuation - the free-spirited and down-to-earth, Sofia (Penelope Cruz).

David is immediately smitten and falls head over heels for her. Cruz here is extremely charming, and makes the love-at-first-sight angle totally believable. It beats me why she gets such a bad rap from some critics. The movie briefly enters romance territory here, which helps explain the motivations for David's later actions.

What happens next is a twisted love triangle between Cruise, Cruz and Diaz - which has terrible consequences for the rich boy ... consequences that he tries to buy his way out of.

How he does this however, is not revealed until the end of the film, at which point the viewer realises that at least half of the film was not what it appeared to be. (Although you can have fun on repeat watches spotting the clues).

Without giving too much away, David begins hallucinating to the point where we can never be sure exactly what his reality truly is, and by extension what the film's reality is. This results in an awesomely twisted sex scene involving himself Julie and Sofia, a romantic entanglement more metaphysical than physical, but all the more poignant for it. And lets be honest here, if you're going to hallucinate, sharing your bed with Penelope Cruz and Cameron Diaz is not a bad way to go!

As mentioned, the supporting cast is impressive. Tilda Swinton, Jason Lee, Timothy Spall, and Noah Taylor all have small but memorable appearances. Kurt Russell is also excellent here, and gets one of the most jaw-dropping scenes when he realises that he's not at all who he thought he was. That scene just blows my mind every time.

As readers of this blog will note, I am a huge fan of movies with great soundtracks, and considering that Cameron Crowe is an ex-Rolling Stone journalist with a long history in the music industry - its not at all surprising that he's pulled together an excellent and diverse group of songs that are both meaningful and sonically excellent.

Any director that finds a way to include the little known gem from The Rolling Stones 'Tattoo You' album (Heaven) has really got their musical shit sorted as far as I'm concerned. But additionally there are choice cuts from Sigur Ros, Radiohead, REM, Thievery Corporation, Underworld, The Chemical Bros, Bob Dylan, U2 and more.

Even the Beach Boys' Good Vibrations in the penultimate scene provides an unexpectedly well-suited atmosphere as Cruise desperately calls for "Tech Support !!!!!!". Another killer scene in a movie that has quite a few.

Undoubtedly Crowe labored long and hard over the soundtrack - its not just the song selection, but the way they've been used which is impressive.

The critics were divided over this film, but its IMDB rating has been slowly creeping up as it reaches the kind of moviegoer who will appreciate it. It's certainly not the kind of film that your average (popcorn) Cruise fan will expect, and perhaps that was part of the problem. I also suspect that many viewers who would really like this film were put off by his involvement.

If you have not seen this film yet, do yourself a favour and check it out. Don't be put off by the film's poster/cover art which in my opinion was an epic fail. It doesn't convey the quality, the intelligence, nor the type of film it is at all, and certainly won't attract the audience who would best appreciate it.

I'm a total sucker for mindfuck movies with killer soundtracks, so my rating is ...

10/10. No question.

PS: Also, check out the original, Abre los Ojos (Open Your Eyes).

Quick Links

Wish they'd release this sucker on Blu-ray already!

R1 DVD	R1 DVD	R2 DVD	R2 DVD

Skinwalkers

2010-05-28T10:04:00.002+12:00

Canada, 2006

Director: James Isaac
Starring: Rhona Mitra, Elias Koteas, Natassia Malthe, Sarah Carter, Jason Behr
IMDB: 4.6

Rhona Mitra definitely has an indefinable x-factor appeal, even though I suspect she's a cyborg. It's an appeal that goes somewhat further than 'check out that boob job', and into some other vaguely spiritual territory that's far more socially acceptable, and less easy to define.

Maybe it's the out-sized lower lip and the way she dangles it, lips parted, in semi-permanent readiness for, or trembling anticipation of, ... the next breath. Could this be the subliminal secret to her appeal?

In any case, the reason for this Mitronic preamble, is to explain how I came to be reviewing this particular effort, as she is perhaps the main reason anyone would be drawn to check it out. However as we shall see, she's not the only attraction of this movie.

Skinwalkers is a horror movie that operates within the werewolf genre, as evidenced by the excellent cover art (which unfortunately looks like nothing you will see in the movie itself). It didn't start out too promisingly, as the cinematography seemed rather mundane with a TV vibe about it. Although there's some pretty shots of the moon and sunsets and that kind of thing inserted in a sneaky attempt at adding visual interest. Things do get better though, and there are many creative scenes later in the piece.

While the storyline adequately anchors proceedings, it's not a little contrived, perhaps even silly - suffering from some fairly hefty believability issues. It also follows a fairly standard arc complete with the obligatory battle finale, itself followed by suitably emotive orchestral mood muzak just so we understand how to feel, when we're meant to feel it. This kind of score is a pet peeve of mine, given my distaste for overt and clumsy manipulation, making me wonder why they kept the satanic riffery for the closing credits, when it would've worked so much better within the movie itself.

Which brings me to my second peeve - the movie features a kid as a pivotal character, and I generally dislike movies featuring kids. What's worse, this kid is a real turd ... you know the kind. When he has to be REAL quiet so the baddies won't hear him as they walk past his hiding spot, he picks that moment to clumsily knock over some random object, resulting in a giveaway noise at exactly the wrong time. If there's one thing worse than kids in a movie, its dumb-ass kids in a movie. And if there's one thing worse than dumb-ass kids in a movie, its horribly cliche moments like this.

Although the idea of having two diametrically opposed groups of werewolves is good, and fairly realistic as all sentient beings are prone to political differences I guess, the idea that the kid is the key point of dispute is contrived to say the least. Although this particular plot detail manages to provide something of a twist to proceedings later on, it ultimately does not make sense in the cold hard light of day. But to make matters worse, Mitramatic is cast as the appointed MILF of said kid, which at once casts her in the least-sexy role of the lot.

However, all is redeemed in the end as the Rhonadendron evolves from stock-standard housewife into a bad-ass, shotgun-toting Mitratron. Now THAT is what we came to see!

But before we get to that, we meet the 'baddies'. We know they're bad because of the overt stereotyping employed ... unshaven, long hair, riding motorbikes - all the common cultural clues are there. They even have a black guy too, just in case your prejudice hadn't kicked in yet.

Luckily, its not long before the action starts - at around the 20 minute mark an extended gunfight kicks in. We learn that werewolves actually prefer to use guns (loaded with silver bullets of course), which is something a bit different I guess. Especially as it was constructed much like a modern-day western.

The bad-guys even ride into town on their choppers in typical cowboy style. I'll allow this to be a valid idea ... maybe even a good one ... but the gunfights went on way too long for my taste. Still, your mileage may vary if you're a gun-slinging kinda moviegoer.

The acting, I have to say, is very good though ... and is the film's saving grace. I guess Elias Koteas would be the only name actor here, although can we also count the Mitra? Depends where you draw the line. The fact its a Canadian production means the actors are not as familiar to me as their Hollywood counterparts, although that should not at all be taken as a reflection of their acting qualities, rather more related to lack of visibility and tabloid exposure.

Koteas is pretty good, he's a solid dude who can act. But in addition, the rest of the cast is made up of promising young-ish actors, and they're certainly a good-looking bunch. It wouldn't surprise me if the producers saved on production expenses by doubling the set as a Levi's advert.

But what really rocked in this movie was the amount of hot, ass-kicking babes in the cast - which is something I have a definite enthusiasm for. And this movie features not just one, but three. As an added bonus you get a bad-ass grandma to boot. All you 'girls with guns' genre enthusiasts take note.

Natassia Malthe (Bloodrayne II) unfortunately isn't given much to do, but manages to look exceptional while not doing it. Dressed in leather pants and denim jacket, over her faux-leather bikini-top over faux-flesh boobs, her trademark shades denoting she's one of the 'baddies'.

Even though she is given very few lines, her character cuts a stylish and sexy swathe through the film, whether riding a chopper, or striking a bad-ass pose with gun in hand. And who doesn't love psychotic knife-wielding gun-toting werewolf nurses ?

Sarah Carter might be just another hot blonde except she really is a terrific actress, and is very impressive here. She goes from the apple-pie girl next door to some kind of exorcist-inspired demon spawn werewolf, and also gets the opportunity to strut the action-woman vibe.

She pulls off all facets of the role with ease, and in fact almost steals the show.

Likewise the lesser supporting characters are uniformly good. The acting was certainly the thing I second-most liked about the film, after the Mitranator of course.

As with any Werewolf movie, the creature effects always require comment, and they are passable I guess. I mean, who's to say what a werewolf actually looks like anyway? The werewolves here resemble their human versions, which is laudably accurate, though perhaps less visually believable.

In summary, the film has too many flaws to be recommended, but does have some great performances from the cast, a few humorous moments, and some pretty good ideas thrown into the mix. Yes the plot is somewhat hokey, but if you can ignore this, the rest of what is on offer is enough to make it an OK watch. Especially with three hot gun-toting babes in full effect, and for fans of the inimitable Ms Mitra.

Rating: 5/10

School of the Holy Beast

2010-05-17T14:33:00.002+12:00

Japan 1974
Original title: Seijû gakuen

Director: Norifumi Suzuki
Starring: Yumi Takigawa, Emiko Yamauchi, Yayoi Watanabe
IMDB: 6.8

Nunsploitation. What the fuck, right? I mean, who thought up this genre? Who even thought it would be a good idea? And why?

Whatever the twisted motivation behind these kind of films, I have to admit that my curiosity was piqued based purely on the outrageous classification - Nunsploitation. It makes me laugh just to say it! Of course it sounded to me like utter and complete trash, and yet I had to at least give it a try.

And lucky that I did, because if this is trash, then its the most artistic and technically competent trash I could ever have imagined. While I was expecting a D-Grade nasty, in actual fact this must rank as one of the best looking films I've ever seen. It really is a testament to the unique qualities of the Japanese studio system that a film featuring lesbian sadomasochistic nuns could end up with production values and artistic merit that exceeds most Oscar winners.

School of the Holy Beast was my introduction to Nunsploitation flicks, so I cannot speak as an expert on the genre. However this is often mentioned as one of the genre's best examples, and its not hard to see why.

At almost 40 years old, the film's technical competence and visual artistry belies the period it was made. Shot in 35mm 'Toeiscope' with an aspect ratio of 2.35:1, you can see from these screenshots that the cinematography is pure art.

If you're looking for the Rolls-Royce of exploitation films, then this surely must be it. Despite the gorgeous visuals, the story doesn't shirk the exploitation factor, and has all the gratuitous and lurid content you could hope for. All this is wrapped up in a coherent and valid story (no vapid plot devices here), with an excellent cast.

It goes without saying that those religiously inclined will be extremely offended by the blasphemous nature of the film. Horny priests and masturbating nuns are just some of the depravity on display here.

The director has really not held a thing back, and it interests me to speculate what his feelings were on the Catholic religion. Did he think it so ridiculous and false that it needed to be exposed as brutally as possible? Or was it just that the pure black and white of the nun's habit offered such aesthetically pleasing visual opportunities?

Of course the Japanese predominantly practice Shinto/Buddhism - and so the cultural baggage attached to Christian religions, and the blasphemy thereof, I'm guessing would be largely irrelevant. What's probably most likely though is that Suzuki simply lifted the concept from earlier Italian films with the same theme. Understanding why Italians might have a nun-fetish is certainly much easier to comprehend.

School of the Holy Beast was a real eye opener and is highly recommended to fans of twisted cinema, exploitation films, and top class cinematography. And if you're a Nunsploitation newbie like I was, I doubt you could start anywhere better than here. A true masterpiece of genre cinema.

Rating: 8/10

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Angel Heart

2010-05-11T02:26:00.002+12:00

USA, 1987

Director: Alan Parker
Starring: Mickey Rourke, Robert DeNiro, Lisa Bonet, Charlotte Rampling
IMDB: 7.3

To take a break from the usual cult trash, obscure oddities and hyper-crazy foreign flicks, this week we revisit a true classic - one of my all time favourite films, Alan Parker's voodoo-infused neo-noir horror, Angel Heart.

Very loosely-based on the old time folklore surrounding blues-man Robert Johnson and his song Cross Road Blues, Parker's film (adapted from the novel Falling Angel), is a supernatural horror story wrapped within a film noir crime thriller. The result is a unique and fascinating film, enhanced considerably by a top notch cast and incredible production values.

Parker of course is responsible for many a fine film, despite not being the household name that he should be. Other films to his credit include Pink Floyd's The Wall, Midnight Express, Birdy, Mississippi Burning, Fame, and Evita - to name just a few in his diverse and award-winning career.

The film begins in the Harlem district of mid 1950's New York City, imbued with a seedy noir atmosphere through the use of a desaturated palette. It's only moments into the movie before we see the first macabre victim, while a suspicious stranger saunters from the dark alley swinging his cane.

Harry Angel (Mickey Rourke) is a down-at-heel gumshoe with a love of cigarettes, bourbon, and pretty women. Preferring the comforts of the bottle to taking overly-dangerous or taxing assignments, he ekes out a meager existence relying on his charm and street-smarts to get by.

There was a time in the 1980's when Rourke was widely touted as one of the most gifted actors of his generation. And in Angel Heart it's not hard to see why - as this is perhaps his finest role.

One day he is contacted by a law firm representing their mysterious client Louis Cyphre (Robert De Niro), who has an unusual assignment for him. It seems that a popular crooner named Johnny Favorite has reneged on a deal, and Harry is hired to locate him.

De Niro is another actor at the top of his game here. Although his part his small, the sheer malevolence implied through the simple peeling of an egg is one of the film's, and also De Niro's, most iconic scenes.

A series of clues lead Harry to New Orleans - a city rife with superstition and voodoo. Once again Parker nails the atmosphere ... the heat and humidity of the old South signaled by portentous cooling fans, dust, sweat, and omnipresent dripping water. The move from the cold climes of New York City to the heat of Louisiana is a crafty parallel of Harry's descent into hell.

Along the way we meet Toots Sweet (played by legendary blues-man Brownie McGhee), and Parker takes the opportunity to infuse the soundtrack with some authentic down-home blues provided by the likes of John Lee Hooker, Dr John, Bessie Smith, and of course Mr McGhee.

Its in this steamy environment that he comes across Epiphany Proudfoot (Lisa Bonet). Bonet is a revelation here, in this her first feature film. She channels a raw, earthy sexuality perfectly in keeping with the role, purring her lines with the bearing and poise of a Voodoo Priestess, all the while conveying a potent sexual availability.

I'm quite sure that no-one before or since has made a simple peasant dress look so good, and its no wonder that Harry is feeling a supernatural attraction to her.

From voodoo rites to fortune tellers, it's an investigation that will cause him to question his very identity, and may even cost him his soul. It doesn't help that all his leads are being systematically murdered in turn, as he finds himself being dragged deeper and deeper into a maelstrom of festering evil.

Of course its not long before he's got Epiphany into the sack for the film's notorious sex scene. A scene that resulted in the film receiving an X rating in America, despite it being not particularly graphic.

There's really only light nudity, although the actors do turn in a vigorous performance, and there's a whole crapload of blood involved. Maybe it was the sex and blood thing that the censors objected to. Or perhaps it is to do with the real identities of the characters?

Parker went to great lengths to ensure historical accuracy, and as can be seen by the attached screen shots the film looks incredible. In combination with the score and well chosen period music, a highly effective atmosphere is created.

There's only one rating I can possibly give this film. It has an excellent story, superb actors, great music, and incredible visuals. There's sex, blood, voodoo ... and even the devil himself. I can ask for no more ...

Rating: 10/10

Release info

On Blu-ray, avoid the Region B from Amazon UK as it has zero extras. Instead I recommend the region-free US Blu-ray, which has a bunch of extra features (although disappointingly, not as many as the Special Edition DVD).

Region A Blu	R1 DVD

Enter the Void - 2nd Trailer released

2010-05-03T18:59:00.003+12:00

Enter the Void (2009)
Director: Gaspar Noe (Irreversible)

Enter the Void is a flick that I have been eagerly awaiting for fucking ages. The first trailer showed almost nothing, but now a second trailer has surfaced that reveals a lot more. Happy to report that it looks like everything I'd hoped it would be. Combined with the great reviews its been getting on the festival circuit, this is my most hotly anticipated release of the year.

But how long before this sucker gets a DVD release? Its been doing the festivals for a year already, with more festivals booked for the rest of the year! For those lucky enough to live in France or the US, you should be able to catch it on theatrical release this year.

The rest of us will just have to keep waiting ...

Secret Undercover Agent - Honey and Bunny

2010-04-29T21:32:00.002+12:00

Japan, 2007
Original title: Himitsu Sennyuu Sousakan: Honey & Bunny

Director: Keiichi Kobayashi
Starring: Haruna Yabuki, Yuri Morishita, Fumie Nakajima

Sometimes we review movies that are so unknown and under-reviewed that it becomes a public-service requirement to give them their due. This is one of those occasions, for its unlikely that this will ever be mistaken for an Oscar nominee.

While ostensibly operating as a parody of the secret agent genre, the real raison d'etre of the film is to get two hugely popular Japanese bikini models in front of the camera and into some sexy outfits. The spoofed-out plot is just a flimsy veneer wrapped around the main attractions.

As the title would suggest, this is about two undercover agents named Honey & Bunny, played by J-idols Haruna Yabuki and Yuri Morishita respectively. Their job is to go undercover to strip joints, fetish parlours, and lingerie shows in order to sniff out the bad guys. As you will have guessed, this involves pretending to work at the aforesaid locations, and wearing the appropriate ... er, disguises.

Yup, flimsy plot contrivance to be sure - but nothing that deviates from the expectations engendered by the DVD cover itself. And for a film of this type, so obviously centred on the sex appeal of the two lead actresses, I can report that the all-important casting has been given the priority it required.

On an intellectual and artistic level, one could draw a parallel with, say, any Jessica Simpson film. The difference here is that its filtered through the distinctly Japanese 'Otaku' (geek) culture, and that its actually pretty funny at times.

Those familiar with the culture will recognise this entails an abundance of panty jokes and a preoccupation with breast-size. Likewise, the locations are centred around the Akihabara 'Electric Town' district of Tokyo. If you've ever visited Akihabara, a suburb where Japanese girls in French maid outfits stand on every corner handing out flyers, you'll realise that this kind of film is actually grounded within a semblance of reality, albeit a uniquely Japanese version.

So let's meet our intrepid secret agents ...

Haruna Yabuki plays secret agent Honey - a reasonably apt codename. Her special ability is flinging her high heels at fleeing criminals. If she happens to miss with the heels, then her next alternative is throwing a bra ... removed in-situ from either herself or her hapless assistant. If you're wondering how that could possibly be effective, you're not alone.

She is also a little bit jealous of her new junior assistant Bunny ... because she has bigger tits.

Yuri Morishita plays the cute and feather-brained junior agent, Bunny. Bunny's special skill is being able to sweat on demand. She is also a bit of an unlikely genius, with a knack for coming up with weird inventions.

Ms Morishita was quite a surprise because her acting was actually pretty awesome. She displays a real comedic talent, combining funny expressions with hilarious physical comedy. It's no surprise that she was brought back for the sequel 'Wildcats in Strip Royale' (to be reviewed soon).

OK, there's no avoiding it ... this is pure T&A, fan-service pandering. I can't believe I've written so much about it already. Call it what you will, the actresses are hot, and that would be the salient point here. It also has enough wacky entertainment value to keep things interesting.

As far as I'm aware, the DVD is only available in Japan (without English subs) - so the only option for English-speaking viewers is to use some google initiative and find a bootleg online.

Rating: 5/10 (3/10 for the film, plus 2 bonus points for the cast)

More screenshots

Hannie Caulder

2010-04-29T00:39:00.015+12:00

USA, 1971

Director: Burt Kennedy
Starring: Raquel Welch, Robert Culp, Christopher Lee, Ernest Borgnine
IMDB: 6.3

Hannie Caulder is a little-known rape/revenge flick from 1971 starring Raquel Welch. At least those are the attributes I picked up on - it's actually more of a Western with a splash of ribald humour thrown in. It also features Christopher Lee (Dracula) and Oscar-winner Ernest Borgnine, so there's definitely pedigree in the cast. Even though Westerns are not my bag, the cast and synopsis piqued my twisted sensibilities enough to give it a shot.

The film starts promisingly with a hand-drawn title sequence featuring distinctly psychedelic visuals that clue you in to the time period the film was made. I especially like the 2nd screencap below ... it would make a great poster!

Three down and dirty bandits, all brothers, are roving from town to town looking for horses to steal, banks to rob, or any other mischief they can find. It seems these guys were meant to be funny in a three stooges kind of way, but any comedic value from their performance was lost on me. They just seemed stupid, and were a weak aspect in a film otherwise blessed with some great performances.

However, they provide some nice scenic shots of cowboys and the wild west, as we follow their travels.

After killing the owner of a ranch in order to steal his horses, the boys get lucky when they find a bonus waiting for them in the homestead. Yup, its the voluptuous Hannie Caulder (Raquel Welch) in the flesh, heaving bosoms and all ... and predictably enough they have their filthy way with her.

But not before brother Rufus adds a little 'rape humour' to proceedings by announcing that he's found supper. Yup, the misogynist tone of the film places it firmly in the 70's!

To top things off they also burn her house down, leaving poor Hannie in the middle of nowhere with nothing but a blanket and a dead husband to bury. What bastards.

Luckily for her, lone bounty hunter Tom Price (Robert Culp) comes along looking for water for his horses. And although they get off to a rocky start, Hannie soon sees how he could help her get revenge on those that have wronged her, eventually persuading him to teach her how to shoot a gun.

Hannie hits the road with him, and we follow them as Hannie proceeds to hunt down the three brothers - a journey that takes them to Mexico and various saloons and brothels. We also meet lecherous townfolk, enigmatic gunslingers, and mexican bandits along the way.

Considering that Raquel Welch was one of the most famous sex symbols of the day, it's not surprising that she is given every opportunity to flaunt her looks. With her flowing mane and sculpted cheekbones, she certainly looks the part.

As a badass babe bent on revenge she is perhaps less successful, at least when judged within the context of the 'girls with guns' genre. Although she cuts a suitably striking figure gun in hand, her soft sexy voice, very feminine figure, and perfectly groomed appearance worked against her in this regard.

There is also quite the preoccupation with her ass ... both in the script and in the cinematography, making it fairly clear where the Director felt the audience appeal lay. Tom comments that its 'the prettiest one I ever saw", and the sheriff also helps himself to a grope (although she has a great comeback for the occasion).

There's even a strangely exploitative scene where a soaking wet Raquel is obliged to massage her new britches in order to get them to fit properly! Of course the camera makes sure that we watch this intimate domestic scene, as she cups and squeezes her butt cheeks into shape.

It's no wonder that Hannie laments later on "Every man I meet is thinking the same thing" - ironic really, as its probably what at least half the audience is thinking too.

Back in 1971 this must have been a fairly controversial film, featuring a multiple rape scene as it does. However you see more skin on the DVD cover than in the film itself, and the vile act concerned was mostly off-camera, as you'd expect with a major star such as Raquel Welch in the title role.

The copy I watched was not the best quality in terms of sound and picture. However, I suspect that if properly restored this could be a good-looking film. There is a new widescreen edition available in the UK which I have not seen. (Edit 24/7/2010 - And a new Region 1 DVD now too.) I have linked to them below for those that are interested.

As an exploitation flick, the film offers little - it's much too tame to be of interest in that genre. However strong performances from Robert Culp, Christopher Lee, and Raquel Welch make the film worth a watch for fans of the lead actress, or for anyone that might appreciate an exploitation-tinged Western.

Rating: 5.5/10

Life Blood

2010-04-23T02:10:00.000+12:00

USA, 2009
aka Pearblossom aka Murder World

Director: Ron Carlson
Starring: Sophie Monk, Anya Lahiri, Angela Lindvall
IMDB: 4.1

Writer/Director Ron Carlson is obviously a guy who knows what the fans want. And with Life Blood he has shown a commendable and refreshing lack of restraint in providing it. However, adjectives such as subtle, tasteful, or nuanced won't be required in this particular review.

The recipe is simple - hot lesbian vampire chicks doing what you want them to - toying with hapless male victims, sucking blood, and inbetween times getting it on with each other. Throw in a dash of gore, a few creative kills, and sprinkle with humor to bake up a tasty dish of wholesome exploitation.

But as any chef will tell you, the secret is in using quality ingredients, and this is undoubtedly a low-budget affair. The movie starts a little slowly, and its obvious early on that the acting and script are low budget. Luckily, it was only 2 minutes and 9 seconds into the movie before we see Rhea (Anya Lahiri) passionately kissing her girlfriend Brooke (Sophie Monk) ... so I hung in there.

The plot is suitably diabolical - basically the girls hit a New Years Eve party in 1969, things go awry, they get killed, God steps in and resurrects them, then transports them 40 years into the future ... as vampires.

Lesbian vampire angels to be exact - one good, one bad. Conveniently, the girls lost their clothes somewhere in the space/time continuum, so they're forced to wander the desert in their lingerie. Heh, don't you just love seedily contrived plot devices?

Oh yeah... turns out God (Victoria's Secret supermodel Angela Lindvall) is not only a woman, but apparently a lesbian vampire too. So God and Rhea have a bit of a vampiric pash before she sends her on her way.

As sharp-eyed readers will have noted, this is total trash - but deliberately so, and it never takes itself seriously. Unfortunately, the film doesn't pull the exploitation thing off particularly successfully - probably needed to get a bit more twisted. And for a movie that 1) Has a script with an undoubtedly exploitational tone, and 2) is firmly targeted at the male (or lesbian) demographic, the tameness of the lesbonics and lack of nudity is an unforgivable crime. This seems to be a trend with U.S genre movies these days, all promise and no delivery.

However, it does have its moments. Like when Brooke slithers up to the hapless gas station attendant, pout and boobs in full effect, and coos "You still wanna get up in this shit?". In fact, I have to give props here to Sophie Monk - who actually turns in a pretty good performance.

Now I could easily make a wisecrack here about her being the best actor in the film, and how that revelation might enlighten readers to the quality on offer here. However that would in fact be slightly unfair to Miss Monk, who really is quite good in her role and enhances the movie's appeal considerably.

While I applaud the intentions of the film-makers to make this seedy kind of exploitation horror flick, it's not likely to make anyone's best-of lists. It is however, good trashy fun at times - there is plenty of dark humour and twisted scenarios, although spoiled somewhat with lame and ineffective dialogue in some scenes. Genre aficionados will likely leave the table less than satisfied, and of course the popcorn crowd should stay far far away.

Rating: 5/10

Quick Link

Life Blood DVD at amazon.com.

Original Poster Art

Vampire's Kiss

2010-04-02T20:36:00.017+13:00

USA, 1988

Director: Robert Bierman
Starring: Nicolas Cage, Jennifer Beals, Maria Conchita Alonso
IMDB: 5.2

Here's a movie that really took me by surprise. A mate had been trying to get me to watch it for a while, but to be honest, a vampire comedy from the 1980s starring Nicolas Cage? Doesn't exactly make for something I'd go out of my way for, and the cheeseball DVD cover doesn't help.

While undeniably funny in a twisted kinda way, in actual fact Vampire's Kiss is not a parody, and much darker than you'd expect. In many ways it sits more easily amongst films such as American Psycho and Edmond. It's that kind of funny.

However, Cage does not have the acting chops of a Christian Bale or William H. Macy, and pretty much hams it up - giving us an over-the-top physical brand of humor more akin to Jim Carrey. This makes for a deliriously fevered performance once the insanity fully takes hold, but also lightens the tone considerably.

Cage plays Peter Loew - a high-flying, hard-drinking, womanising yuppie. In fact, when we first meet him he's shitfaced drunk, staggering back to his apartment with a new lady-friend in tow for a bit of the old in and out. In a seemingly innocuous event, a bat disturbs their fun and forces them to leave the apartment. This gains significance later on - though not in the way you might think.

The next morning he's at work, looking appropriately seedy in a suit with no socks, being the epitome of the asshole boss to his long-suffering Latina assistant Alva (Maria Conchita Alonso). In fact he really gives her a hard time, taking a psychotic glee in grinding her underfoot. Then he's off to counseling with his psychiatrist who doesn't seem to realise just how fucked up he really is.

The next night he scores again, but this time with Rachel (Jennifer Beals), and we get the second sex scene within the first 20 minutes of the movie. This is a 1980's movie - so its gratuitous of course.

In any case, inviting Rachel into his home might not have been the best idea, because she's a sexy vampiric seductress! What's more, she's the jealous kind.

Things start to go downhill for Peter from here on in - he starts avoiding sunlight, sleeps under his couch, wears shades to work, and his psychotic behaviour becomes more and more pronounced. But while we understand this downward spiral is due to the vampirism taking hold, is it really?

In the last 30 minutes, the true nature of the film starts to reveal itself for a surprising revelation. Of course there were small clues along the way, but I'm not going to spoil it here.

This is an oddball flick from the 1980's which I found to be surprisingly twisted. This must have been made before the censors started going PC on us - there's nudity, explicit swearing, rape, murder, and vampirism all rolled into one darkly humorous film. Cage's performance is perhaps over-wrought, but is enjoyable and certainly makes the movie.

Sound and visuals are nothing spectacular, although there are a few quite good-looking scenes, especially given the film had a budget of just $2 million. For something a bit different, Vampire's Kiss is well worth checking out.

Rating: 7/10

Where to buy

The DVD seems to have gone OOP in region 1, but can still be found cheap at Amazon UK.

Trailer for Julio Medem's 'Room in Rome'

2010-03-21T12:30:00.015+13:00

A trailer for Spanish auteur Julio Medem's next film, Habitacion en Roma (Room in Rome) has surfaced on the net. By the looks of the trailer its a saucy lesbian drama, but knowing the quality of Medem's work, it's likely to be far more than that. Medem's films are usually surreal and thought-provoking, and generally can't be effectively reduced to the trailer format.

Judging by the trailer, it seems the film has also been shot in English ... perhaps a first for the director.

We're big Medem fans here, so we'll be keeping an eye out for this when its released (Edit: UK release Oct 18, 2010). Interesting to see the film stars Elena Anaya who you may recall from his 2001 film Sex and Lucia.

You can view the official trailer here, or the much sexier unofficial redband trailer here.

Quick Links

Region B Blu	R2 DVD

Vampire Girl vs Frankenstein Girl

2010-03-16T18:47:00.023+13:00

Japan, 2009
Original title: Kyûketsu Shôjo tai Shôjo Furanken

Director: Yoshihiro Nishimura, Naoyuki Tomomatsu
Starring: Yukie Kawamura, Takumi Saito, Eri Otoguro, Eihi Shiina
IMDB: 6.8

Following the worldwide success of his previous film Tokyo Gore Police, fans of director Yoshihiro Nishimura were eager to see what he would come up with next ...

Would he use his new-found fame to obtain better funding and elevate his creative vision to the next level? Would he take the opportunity to work with a more substantial plot and delve deeper into the quirks of Japanese society? Would he, in short, transcend his low-budget splatter origins to deliver something more ... intelligent?

Fuck no. With a title like Vampire Girl vs Frankenstein Girl - you know this is going to be B-grade schlock all the way.

And while we might have hoped for more plot, more budget, and more depth - what we have instead is simply more of the same. Which is not necessarily a bad thing when you're creating some of the most outrageously twisted movies in film today.

Fans of the ludicrously warped end of Japanese splatter cinema, and in-particular Nishimura's signature style, will no doubt find much to love here. After all, where else could you see a vampiric schoolgirl suck the face (literally) off a frankensteined classmate, headbutt the fleshless skull clean off her shoulders - and with uncanny aim, have said skull vampirized mid-air and land directly on the face of another poor schoolgirl to repeat the process?

With an extremely high WTF factor, you won't see anything quite like this anywhere else. For those of you twisted enough to love this type of lurid spectacle, sit back and let the insanity (and blood), wash over you.

The story takes place at Tokyo High School, in a classroom replete with iconic Japanese teen fashion cliches - the Gothic Lolitas, the Ganguro girls, and of course the wrist-cutters. All of which are exaggerated to the point of extreme parody. Especially the Ganguro girls, one of which has taken tanning to the next level by wearing negroid facial prosthetics as part of her daily 'outfit'. Another Ganguro even has an African lip plate. And if you've seen Tokyo Gore Police then you can guess what the wrist-cutters are up to!

The story begins on Valentine's Day, and in Japan the custom is for girls to give chocolate to the guys they like. (On March 14, guys return the favor). Monami (J-idol Yukie Kawamura) has just transferred to the class, and has decided to give chocolate to the class hunk Mizushima (Takumi Saito). The problem is that the leader of the Gothic Lolita clique, Keiko (Eri Otoguro) has already decided Mizushima is "her" boyfriend .... and she's pissed.

Turns out that there's more to the demure Monami than meets the eye though. Luckily for Keiko, her father is the deputy principle, and a mad-scientist to boot. He's been working in Frankenstein fashion to re-animate life, assisted by the school's psychotic nymphomaniac nurse.

All this ties together in a story involving a Vampire Girl, a Frankenstein Girl, and one shitload of blood. But then you probably guessed as much by now.

Yukie Kawamura, a popular gravure idol turned actress, doesn't have the super-cool poise of Eihi Shiina, but does a pretty good job of grounding her character in some semblance of reality. Well ... as much as possible given the circumstances! And perhaps more importantly given the genre, looks super-cute even when covered in blood.

Although the film's budget constraints are sometimes exposed, for the most part the visuals are impressive - hyper-stylized, with bold saturated colours and inventive effects. Of special note are the scenes when a character is turned into a vampire, reminiscent of a particularly potent acid trip, with humans being perceived as nothing more than walking blood systems. Very, very cool.

It goes without saying that the gore effects are top-notch, and the battle scenes contain the obligatory poses, creative use of body-parts, and ridiculously violent and unlikely kills.

Also of note is the hard rock soundtrack that adds a driving intensity, ensuring energy levels remain high throughout. This is a film that you really should see live and loud in a theatre if at all possible, so you can fully enjoy the experience along with a bunch of like-minded maniacs.

In summary, and taking the title into consideration, fans will definitely get what they came for, and a bucket-load more besides. One note however - I can see this style getting a bit tired if Nishimura doesn't bring something a bit more substantial to the table in his future films. But as his next release is titled "Mutant Girls Squad" - I doubt that will be any time soon.

In the meantime I'm more than happy to revel in yet another feverishly twisted imagining from the mind of Yoshihiro Nishimura. And while there's nothing really new here, Japanese schoolgirls covered in blood and kicking the crap out of each other never really gets old now, does it ?

Rating: 7/10

Note: Technically this is not a solo Nishimura film as he shares director's duties with Naoyuki Tomomatsu. Nishimura's next solo project is entitled Helldriver and is due to start shooting this Spring.

More screenshots

Trailer

Where to buy

Vampire Girl vs. Frankenstein Girl [DVD] [2009] at Amazon UK

Girly

2010-03-09T02:50:00.018+13:00

aka Mumsy, Nanny, Sonny and Girly
U.K., 1970

Director: Freddie Francis
Starring: Vanessa Howard, Ursula Howells, Howard Trevor, Michael Bryant
IMDB: 7.0

In my relentless pursuit of ever more obscure cheap thrills and mayhem, I never suspected I'd discover a 'sadistic schoolgirl killer' movie coming out of the U.K. in 1970! Pre-dating similar 'twisted family' movies such as Takashi Miike's 'Happiness of the Katakuris', Girly is a very black comedy revolving around an upper-class British family ruled by a matriarch known only as Mumsy (Ursula Howells).

Her outlook on life is quintessentially British, insisting on correct manners at all times, and instilling in her family the importance of 'sticking to the rules'. Along with her knitting partner Nanny, they run a happy and efficient family home, enjoying and encouraging the playfulness of the children Sonny and Girly.

However, this is no ordinary family unit - Mumsy's overbearing control has kept the children at an emotional age of around 6 years old, despite being in their 20's. As such, they still wear their school uniforms, sleep in children's cribs, and spend their time playing games such as 'cowboys and indians' and 'playing shop'.

Mumsy and Nanny are exceedingly indulgent of the children, even allowing them to visit the local park and bring home 'new friends' as they please. Said 'new friends' are in fact homeless winos, lured back to the estate by the promise of alcohol and certainly encouraged by the coquettish wiles of Girly and her short skirts.

Once back to the estate, the new friends are welcomed into the family with true British hospitality, including meals, their own room, and nightly baths from Nanny. In return however, they are expected to stick to the rules which first and foremost includes Not Escaping, and in addition pandering to every whim as the children's new playmate.

Disobeying the rules is not tolerated, and any infractions mean the new friend is put on trial - usually resulting in the harshest of sentences. It doesn't help that the children behave like all children do, making up the rules as they go along. And it's no surprise that they've been through quite a few 'new friends' already.

However, the promise of a bit of girly-action keeps the men toeing the line, enduring constant degradations and bearing the brunt of the children's violent practical jokes.

The family's problems begin with the arrival of 'new friend in 2'. The newly captured friend assigned to Room 2 is a male gigolo, and does not at all mind being trapped and pampered in a house with three single women. It doesn't take him long to find a way of sexually manipulating the situation to his best advantage.

The ensuing jealousies make for a gloriously demented finale as the accepted family structure is called into question, rivalries are settled with brutal finality, and maybe a happy new balance will be reached at last.

When this film was made, Director Freddie Francis handed the completed film over to the studio, only for them to promptly go bankrupt shortly thereafter. Consequently, it never received a great deal of marketing and until recently was thought to be lost forever. Even the director did not have a copy.

However in 2004, bootlegs from an old VHS started to appear on the internet, and its from one of them that these screen-shots are taken. However there is very good news on the horizon! Scorpion Entertainment have picked up the rights to the film and are releasing it as a Region 0 DVD on March 30th (see link below). I've seen screen-shots of the new DVD and the quality looks fantastically better. I'll be picking one up for sure.

In summary, Girly is a deliciously black comedy and a worthy addition to the Twisted Flicks library. Vanessa Howard's sexy and malevolent portrayal of Girly is especially notable, however the acting is good all-round in this poignantly twisted caricature of a British family. However those unfamiliar with traditional British culture may find the film especially bizarre, even puzzling, given the constant references to old-time nursery rhymes and games.

Rating 6.5/10

Where to Buy

R1 DVD - amazon.com

Sheitan

2010-03-02T19:45:00.012+13:00

France, 2006
aka Satan

Director: Kim Chapiron
Starring: Vincent Cassel, Roxane Mesquida, Monica Bellucci, Olivier Bathelemy
IMDB: 5.5

When I watched this I had forgotten that Vincent Cassel was in it ... but as the credits rolled I was shocked to see which role he had played. Took me totally by surprise. I haven't seen many of his movies, but I know he is the smooth French dude that's been dating Monica Bellucci for approximately forever - so his transformation here is very impressive. In fact his performance elevates the film considerably.

Sheitan is at its core a fairly standard 'teens-in-peril' horror flick scenario. A group of young guys leave a nightclub to stay at the country house of a hot chick that one of them has just scored at the club. Little do they know that she's a total freak, in a totally freakish family who seem to have dabbled a bit too seriously in some kind of satanic ritual.

In any case, once they arrive things progressively get weird, and realistically enough - the guy who scored the chick but has yet to consummate the deal is powerfully inclined to urge everyone to stay - at least until he's banged her. For once in a horror movie you can actually understand why they don't just GET THE FUCK OUT. A common problem in most films in this genre.

The tension mounts, on with the bodycount! The way the situation spirals out of control is truly creepy, and its believability adds considerably to the experience. This is certainly a class above the average predictable teen slasher. Adding to the fun are some very funny scenes, effectively releasing the tension momentarily only to ratchet it up again shortly after.

Also mixed in are a few sexy scenes - after all these are horny young guys who have mostly just one thing on their mind, and this is what has got them into trouble to begin with. The sexy Eve (Roxane Mesquida) uses this to her advantage, convincingly playing the seductress while leading two of the guys on - eventually taking them both to bed. Hot.

Overall, Sheitan is a very well executed horror movie that does what a good horror should do - creep you out. Aside from Cassel's performance however, there's nothing particular that elevates it to being a classic, but is highly recommended if you're in the mood for a good horror flick. It's vastly better than most Hollywood slashers, and I enjoyed it a lot.

Note: While Monica Bellucci is listed in the cast of this movie, you'll have to really pay attention to spot her. Her presence is really just a cameo.

Rating: 6.5/10

Trailer

Quick Links

R1 DVD	R2 DVD

Okul

2010-03-01T23:19:00.014+13:00

Turkey, 2004
English title: The School

Director: Durul Taylan, Yagmur Taylan

Starring: Nehir Erdogan, Berk Hakman, Melisa Sozen, Sinem Kobal
IMDB: 4.7

While Okul is not a particularly twisted movie, nor particularly original - I had never seen a Turkish movie before, so was eager to see what their film industry could produce.

Guldem (played by the gorgeous Nehir Erdogan) is a high school student who smiled once at Gokalp, a fellow student, who subsequently develops an obsession for her. He begins writing stories for her every day, and leaving them for her to find.

Unfortunately her boyfriend Ersin (Berk Hakman) discovers one of the letters, and publicly humiliates the guy by reading it out loud in the schoolyard. Next thing you know, Gokalp is swan-diving to his death from one of the school's buildings.

Cut to exactly a year later, and Guldem and her bevy of hot friends start being haunted by strange visions and manifestations.

This allows the directors to include some interesting ideas including demons in mirrors, ghostly hallucinations, and even a cellphone seance. In one of the few scenes that distinguishes it from any other Hollywood flick of its type, is a nice looking Islamic scene in one character's religious-inspired hallucinations.

While the film has moments of suspense and horror, it also verges on parody at times. Treading this middle ground unfortunately reduces it's effectiveness as either one or the other - horror or comedy.

What you get, is a group of very good looking people running around and screaming a lot in the time-honoured horror/slasher tradition. But don't expect much more than a few light scares, let alone any slashing - there is next to no gore, and in what may be a first for a horror movie - no death either! Gorehounds and horror aficionados beware. There is also no nudity, except for one of the movie's weakest scenes where some American porn is shown on a screen.

Personally, I'm not a stickler for either gore or nudity, so this aspect was fine with me. What hurts the film more is the uneven comedy scenes - maybe if the film had played out more singularly as a horror movie it would've been more effective. However I hear this is Turkey's first horror movie, and as such kudos must be given for a pretty decent first attempt.

Adapted from a Turkish ghost novel, Okul is a competently made teen horror flick with a great performance from the main actress, and a few splashes of creativity thrown in. Its on the same level as most recent Hollywood teen horror movies, but doesn't add anything unique to the genre that would make non-Turkish speakers seek it out. Additionally, its middle-of-the-road approach makes it more suitable for teens than as a serious horror contender.

On a positive note, lead actress Nehir Erdogan was a standout and seems to be the complete package - possessing both the looks and acting ability to go far. Had she been born in the USA I'm sure she would be on the cover of every magazine by now, and inundated with film offers. As it is, she has only been in one other movie to date, four years after this one. The fact that her talents have been so under-utilised is a shame.

Also of note is the soundtrack, which features some great Turkish rock music. In summary, Okul is well worth checking out if you're a Turkish teen, or like me just keen to check out some Turkish cinema - otherwise it offers little new to the Western viewer (except perhaps for the spectacularly gorgeous Nehir).

Rating: 5.5/10

Video clip

Candy

2010-02-25T20:32:00.022+13:00

USA, 1968

Director: Christian Marquand

Starring: Ewa Aulin, Marlon Brando, Richard Burton, Walter Matthau, James Coburn
IMDB: 5.1

Candy is a sex comedy from the peace and love era of the late 60's that has a surprising amount going for it. The movie's cast features no less than four Oscar winners, the set design is by Oscar winner Dean Tavoularis (The Godfather, Apocalypse Now), and the score is provided by Grammy and Oscar winner Dave Grusin.

Add a psychedelic rock soundtrack by Steppenwolf and The Byrds, along with cameos from the likes of Ringo Starr, Sugar Ray Leonard, and Anita Pallenberg and the result is a definite step above the average guilty pleasure.

Despite all the talent on offer, the main attraction here is our perpetually perplexed heroine Candy - played by Miss Teen Sweden, Ewa Aulin - who has both the looks and the IQ of a barbie doll. (Her wide-eyed and breathless delivery surely must have inspired Anna Faris' character in the Scary Movie series).

As a naive and trusting coed with a heart of gold, Candy seems unaware of the effect she has on men, and each one she comes in contact with wastes no time in talking her out of her clothes and into a quick game of hide the salami - with Candy protesting less than half-heartedly.

Whether its the poet with his romantic metaphysical 'needs', the doctor with his 'examinations', the film-maker with his 'make you a star' routine, or the guru and his journey to a higher state of being (reached of course by working their way through the Kama Sutra), poor Candy seems like a bewildered Alice, in a Wonderland populated with horny men. However it seems she really doesn't mind all that much, after all.

While the men are portrayed without exception as sleazoids, they can't be entirely blamed - Candy's miniskirts and flimsy dresses show her barbie-doll figure to best effect, and her predilection for innocently speaking in double-entendres doesn't help matters.

There is no nudity to speak of, and the sex is never really shown in plain sight - nevertheless this is a very sexual film, without being explicit. The script is riddled with the aforementioned double entendres ... "please come inside", "we're going in all the way", and "there's more than one way to breathe, not just in and out, but up and down and back and forth. Lie down, we're going to breathe."

Adding visual metaphors such as a crowd pulsing back and forth in a sexual rhythm, and the way an onlooker's hand moves to her crotch as a doctor explains an exciting new penetrative procedure create a slyly pervasive sexual undercurrent.

When Candy finally reaches the last stage of enlightenment, the answer she finds in a Buddhist temple turns out to be disturbingly Freudian. Perhaps there's some hidden philosophical insight to be discovered here, but I'll leave that to you to discover.

All in all, Candy is light-hearted bawdy fun, and a worthwhile cinematic trip back to the 60's. It's a bit dated in parts, and more than a little silly in others ... but recommended for those interested in a different kind of comedy. And worthwhile if only to see Walter Matthau and Marlon Brando's performances.

Rating: 6/10

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Boxer's Omen

2010-02-20T02:23:00.013+13:00

Hong Kong, 1983
Original title: Mo

Director: Chih-Hung Kuei
Starring: Philip Kao Fei, Lin Hsiao-yen, Bolo Yeung
IMDB: 7.2 (!)

I've seen far more than my share of fucked up, twisted and utterly bat-shit movies in my time - after all this blog ain't called Twisted Flicks for nothing. But this little gem may be one of THE most twisted movies I've ever seen. And I do not say this lightly.

Coming from the Shaw Bros studios, Boxer's Omen is even more schizophrenic that you'd expect from a country famous for throwing multiple genres into their movies. It starts out as a martial arts movie, segues into a triad theme, introduces a supernatural ghost-monk, and cuts to a completely gratuitous sex scene ... all within the first 15 minutes!

This is the kind of movie that all 'normal' people should steer well clear of. But lover's of surreal, shocking, and outright bizarre film will absolutely lap it up. If I could draw any comparisons, I'd say the overall weirdness mixed with moments of insane genius and stunning visuals is most akin to Jodorowsky's Holy Mountain. Mix into that a bit of Rocky/Bloodsport, South-Asian supernatural mayhem, Buddhist shenanigans and some fairly disturbing gore, and you'll get an idea of the experience that is Boxer's Omen.

This scattergun approach means that almost everyone will find something to enjoy here, and equally likely will find something they won't. One word of warning - some of the gore scenes are disturbingly realistic and may involve cruelty to animals.

The plot is convoluted, but here's a basic snapshot ...

After Thailand's champion kickboxer Mr. Bubo (Bolo Yeung) loses a bout to Hong Kong's Chan Wai, he doesn't take it well and viciously trounces him after the fight is ended, breaking his back and paralysing him for life. Chan Wai asks his brother Chan Hung (Philip Ko) to take revenge for him. Meanwhile, Hung is seeing visions of a mysterious ghost monk who seems to be trying to tell him something.

Hung takes off for Bangkok where he issues a challenge to Mr. Bu-bo, a revenge fight to be held in three month's time. But while he is in Thailand he is drawn to a Buddhist temple, where he meets (the dead) Abbot Qing Zhao - apparently his twin-brother from a previous life. As their fates are intertwined, Hung agrees to become a monk and help fight evil.

After completing his training, Hung then becomes embroiled in all manner of voodoo shenanigans, forcing him into battle against a witch doctor and his devilish minions including animated bat skeletons, crocodile skulls, and robot buddhas. In another scenario, a crocodile is eviscerated and a mummy placed inside its carcass, to emerge somewhat later as a naked witch.

And if that sounds fairly strange ... believe me, that's not the half of it.

This is a patchy and scattered film in every sense of the word. Moments of sheer creative brilliance are interspersed with shockingly woeful effects, the mostly stunning cinematography is punctuated with scenes that could've been shot by a beginner, and the soundtrack is at times gloriously psychedelic, but contains sound effects as basic as someone wobbling a sheet of tin.

Obviously budget was an issue here and the film-makers were forced to be creative. But for all its flaws, you will certainly come out of this movie knowing you've seen something unique. There are also some nice locations featured including Hong Kong, Bangkok and Katmandu - the last even including a mini-travelogue segment on the temple.

I can't say I'd easily recommend this film to anyone I know, its just too far out there for most tastes. However for the more adventurous viewer, the film's flaws are more than compensated by many spectacular scenes, and sheer film-making audacity.

Rating: 7/10

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Black Dynamite

2010-02-11T02:10:00.012+13:00

USA, 2009

Director: Scott Sanders
Starring: Michael Jai White, Arsenio Hall, Buddy Lewis, Salli Richardson-Whitfield
IMDB: 7.7

Ever since Tarantino proclaimed his love for old school genre films with 1997's Jackie Brown, and then took it further with Kill Bill and Grindhouse, genre cinema has acquired a kind of retro chic (and bankability) that has brought it into mainstream respectability ... well relatively at least.

For movie lovers tired of the same old politically-correct, censored by consumer panel Hollywood bore-fests this can only be a good thing, because for one it means we get more hilariously twisted films like this.

Perhaps the reason for their popularity is the legitimate excuse it provides to do away with all political-correctness and get back to some good old-fashioned sub-wholesome fun. And that's exactly what we get here with Black Dynamite, a hilariously cheesy throwback to the golden era of 70s blaxploitation - complete with the requisite sexism, racism, macho posturing and kung fu!

Our titular hero, Black Dynamite (Michael Jai White), is a Vietnam vet turned pimp who provides his own unique brand of righteous street justice. Whether ensuring the hookers get paid, or ridding the neighborhood of drugs, he's got a heroic pose and classic one-liner for all occasions.

With his smooth 'fro, manly moustache and funky wardrobe its no wonder that he's a ladies man as well. He even preaches racial equality in his own special way, as seen in the screen shot below. ...

The attention to period detail is awesome ... from the fashion, to the decor and the music - it's all been meticulously crafted. Even the visuals and sound were created using period equipment or faked to resemble it.

And if you keep your eyes open you'll notice many gaffs typical of low-budget amateurish productions - like sound booms coming into view, fleeing criminals getting the car door stuck on the grass verge, or Dynamite himself abruptly changing direction so that the conveniently placed tray of eggs could be knocked over. Of course here the gaffs are entirely intentional.

The story here is a mashup of blaxploitation cliches, and really just a vehicle for the jokes and parody to operate within. In a nutshell, some jive turkey has killed Dynamite's brother and he needs to get to the bottom of a web of intrigue to find out who is responsible. A journey that takes him right to the very top as he discovers a diabolical conspiracy to keep the black brothers down, perpetuated of course by Whitey (aka The Man).

No cheesy 70's parody would be complete without the formulaic love interest, and here it is provided when Dynamite meets Gloria (Salli Richardson-Whitfield) - a sexy, afro-sporting political activist. But will Dynamite be able to coax her into his bedroom ?

While the movie drags slightly in the middle, it is laugh-out-loud funny and guarantees a great time with a bunch of mates and a crate of beer. The production values are excellent, and White's performance as Black Dynamite makes it seem he was born for the role.

Of special note is the superb soundtrack crafted by Adrian Younge that establishes a funky 70s vibe, and even features a few tracks custom written for the movie. Crank it up loud and immerse yourself in the 70's experience!

Black Dynamite is one of the best retro parodies I've seen, and a definite contender for comedy of the year. Can you dig it?

8/10. Highly recommended.

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I'm a Cyborg, But That's OK

2010-01-27T13:04:00.005+13:00

Korea, 2006
Original title: Saibogujiman kwenchana

Director: Park Chan-wook
Starring: Lim Su-jeong, Rain
IMDB: 7.1

I'm ashamed to say that I didn't pay attention to this when it was released, due mostly to the film's title and cover art - which made it seem like a Korean romcom melodrama - not exactly my style.

However what I didn't realise, and should have, was that this is a Park Chan-wook movie (Oldboy, Thirst, etc) ... and Mr Park just doesn't make bad movies. Period. In fact he seems to be single-handedly redefining excellence in every genre he attempts.

This is creative film-making at its best and just another confirmation that he is one of the most incredible directors around right now. I've heard that Park made this movie as a departure from his usual style so that his 12yo daughter could watch one of his movies. Well, rest assured - this is not at all what I'd consider a child's movie. Although it does have a somewhat more upbeat heart than let's say, revenge-killing, it is still wildly surreal, offbeat and intelligent.

The movie follows Cha Young-goon (Lim) who ends up in a lunatic asylum, believing that she's actually a cyborg. Using her grandma's false teeth to converse with vending machines and light fixtures, it's not such a surprise that she has ended up here.

The problem is that she keeps running out of energy. Obviously the hospital food is of no use to a cyborg, but sucking batteries isn't giving her a great deal of juice either.

Luckily she meets up with Park Il-soon (Rain), who is able to steal the peculiarities or delusions of other patients. In a nod to the director's previous Revenge trilogy, she convinces him to steal her 'sympathy' so that she is free to remorselessly wipe-out the hospital orderlies.

Along the way we meet many of the other patients, all with their own strange quirks. One patient walks everywhere backwards while believing that everything that goes wrong is his fault. Another can't stop eating but has magic boots that enable her to fly if she concentrates hard enough.

What's really interesting is how Park has used the delusions of the schizophrenic patients to show an altered reality, allowing the film to integrate Alice in Wonderland style visuals, psychotic killing sprees, and sci-fi elements into the story completely seamlessly. This is quite some feat!

To say any more of the plot would spoil the thrill of the ride, and I'm not sure I could fully do it justice in any case. Fans of unique, surreal movies should not delay in checking this one out. It's extremely funny, well-written, well-acted and has top-notch production values.

As with all of Park's movies, the visuals are spectacular - but even more so here. Just check out the screen-caps to see what I mean - and I could easily have included four times as many.

Rating: 9/10

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For another film in this vein, also check out Welcome to the Quiet Room from Japan.

Where to buy

R2 DVD - Amazon UK